Upside Down Cross
by Xrizz
Summary: What do you want me to do, Embry?" I begged. "All you have to do is give up your position as Alpha." he said flatly. "Fine, you're Alpha! Just let her go!" He smiled smugly, "Whatever you say, Jake." he said, and in one swift movement, pushed her off. R
1. Preface

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters, places or any other Twilight related items associated with Twilight. All credit goes to Stephanie Meyer- Author of the Series.

**Upside Down Cross.**

"_Control me  
Hit me and scold me  
The hurtful unholy  
Its endless and endless." _

_- Upside Down Cross- Die mannequin  
_

**+Preface+**

She dropped to her knees in front of me, crying into her hands. She made nearly no noise as she cried, but to me, the sound of each tear falling was equally as loud as a jet on take off- you simply could not ignore it, but you wished you could have stopped it. I wanted to stop her tears, but what could I have possibly said to make her feel better? There were many things I could have done, but turning back time was not one of them. Pretending this never happened was impossible.

I could not have imagined worse, but apparently, she could. She continued in her tears, but I stood crippled by what I saw within her mind- images too vivid to be simply imagined. I was seeing this moment through her eyes; through a pair of terrified eyes- and _I_ felt like that too. What he was doing was… horrific and indescribable. And I felt fear. Fear and weakness, because I could not stop what already happened. I had used the wrong term before- "violation" is too say it much less than mildly. But what he'd done to her could not be summed up by one, one hundred, one thousand or one million words. It was unbearable- or more so, unforgivable. It was…

Murder. The murder of a soul and it's innocence.

I, too, lowered myself to my knees. I clenched my teeth and took her in my arms. My cold arms, which could have done everything, but instead, did nothing at all. My cold hands gripped her in an attempt to keep her close, but longed to squeeze every milliliter of life from his soulless body. My cold body grew slowly warmer as the heat of anger rose within me.

Her tears somehow became stronger; but to change those into the joy and laughter we both longed for was merely impossible, as these were a result of passed events- and I couldn't change the past.

But I _could _do one thing.

"Jacob and I will take care of this. Embry _will _be dealt with. I promise you, Renesmee."

She looked up and clutched my sleeves. A look of pure mortification crossed her features; her tear soaked features.

"No…" she whispered, "No, Dad! Jacob can't know- if he finds out… Embry will… he'll…"

But she couldn't finish her sentence as the tears fell again.

"That Monster!" I said under my breath.

My cold hands then dreamed themselves a wonderful dream; to lace themselves around his neck and tighten until my cold palms were touching through the remaining pieces of his life.


	2. False Facades

**Just a quick note- Renesmee and Jacob are not **_**yet **_**together in this story. They **_**will**_** hook up though. After this "issue" is dealt with. All part of Embry's master plan? But what for? You'll find out. Muahahahaha! Also, thanks to the band Die Mannequin for writing the awesome song "Upside Down Cross." Check it out. Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. All credit goes to Stephanie Meyer. I also do not own Upside Down cross (the song). Lyrics and references go to Die Mannequin. By the way, Renesmee's POV will **_**rarely **_**be used in this story for purposes you'll understand later. ENJOY! (P.S. this is set 8 years post BD. In other words, Nessie is physically and mentally 17)**

_**Jacob's POV**_

I jumped the steps to the Cullen's place. I was about to knock, but of course, Edward answered the door already. I should have known. No one ever had the time for knocking. But then again- who ever knocked? Their house was so far in the trees that no sales rep could even find them.

"Hey, Eddie!" I greeted. His black eyes narrowed at my nickname. I wasn't the only one who addressed him as such. He sighed.

"She'll be down in a second." He said; acid in his voice. He turned around and walked to the living room, disregarding my presence. _'Grouchy today?' _I thought. I heard his growl from the other room. I shrugged it off.

"Jacob!" I heard Nessie greet from the upper floor. She came flying down the stairs. I opened my arms- I didn't have to be an Alice to figure out what was going to happen next. She jumped into them and laced her arms around my shoulders, squeezing the breath out of me. But God knows, that wasn't the reason my breath escaped me.

"Fancy meeting _you _here." I snickered when she released me from her not-so-iron grasp. She rolled her eyes, and turned around, walking to the living room. "I feel so unloved," I mumbled.

She giggled, gave her father a kiss on the cheek, and told him she'd be back by midnight latest. _As if._ He let her go reluctantly. She walked back to where I was. I hadn't moved since Edward gave me that evil glare.

We walked to the Rabbit. I was surprised it was still running all these years, but I guess anything can happen. She climbed in the passenger's seat, me in the driver's. I stuck the key in the ignition, making casual conversation so as Nessie wouldn't hear the obvious tuning it needed. My dear Rabbit was beyond repair.

"What's with your darling Father today?" I asked sarcastically as I breathed the life into the exhaust.

"He hasn't hunted in a while." She said flatly, completely bored by the subject of Edward's well-being, "He gets quite grumpy. You know how much insisting it took for him to let me go tonight?" I laughed at the scowl painted on her face.

"How much?" I asked, with a smirk on my face. I was already aware of the answer.

She sighed, "A lot." I laughed, and so did she. At least she'd managed too.

I finally got the gas going and backed out of the Cullen's driveway. They didn't need an eyesore like my car next to their precious jewels. Ha ha, '_precious jewels.' _I smiled to myself at my immature joke. I needed to grow up.

"What's so funny?" Renesmee asked, lifting an eyebrow.

"Perverted joke involving your family's cars." I said, not willing to go further. She looked at me as if I were crazy. Her eyes asked me how I could have possibly made a connection between cars and... Well, yeah. She slapped me on the arm, regardless of the fact she still didn't understand. The day she did, Edward would kill me for her picking up on my mentality.

We drove down the street. It was already dark outside, and the moon was nearly full. It hung; a silver lamp, illuminated by nothing but the darkness of the sky behind it.

**...**

"And then that bastard stole my chips!" Seth exclaimed, waving his hands in the air as if to describe a tsunami rather than a bag of Doritos. But to him, I guess the action would amount to the same level of tragedy.

"You know, I'm right here." Quil said, rolling his eyes and laughing at the memory. Seth glowered at him, which only made him laugh more. "Oh, their cheesy goodness!" he added sarcastically.

Embry had barely said two words through the bonfire, and looked like he was deep in thought. I couldn't imagine why- Embry never thought! I'd ask him about it later.

"Embry, are you alive?" Leah asked, looking utterly uninterested with the idea of Embry and his though process. _Or maybe someone else would ask him._

"Hm?" He mumbled, looking as if he'd just been caught robbing a store. I laughed as he was startled from his daze.

"Point proven." She rolled her eyes. Embry laughed nervously, but everyone else just laughed. At him. Sucker.

Seth continued with his story until it came to the conclusion- Seth and Quil began to throw joke punches until Leah came in and ruined the fun. Leah seemed to enjoy this version of the story; apparently, she "ruins everyone's fun," according to Embry, who had finally decided to join the present. She managed to get a few laughs from his accusation.

A few hours had passed, and everyone had eventually split into their own conversations after a while of humorous story-telling. Nessie checked her watch, and a look of dismay crossed her face. She sighed.

"Ugh. It's almost midnight." She said, with pure disgust etched on her face. If only Edward could see this. I laughed to myself, "I feel like Cinderella. And not in a good way." She added. It looked as if she wanted to say more, but decided against it.

"_Edzilla_'s gonna want you home, huh?" I asked, jutting out my lower lip as if I were four. She smiled and rolled her eyes as she stood up. I stood up as well. We turned around, and were about to walk back toward where I ditched the old Rabbit, but Embry jumped from his seat.

"Wait!" he called, clutching Renesmee's wrist. She jumped, not expecting the gesture. I stared him down maybe a little too harshly. It was habit. He smiled apologetically, letting her go from his hold. But there was something in his smile that didn't belong- yet I couldn't place what it was.

"Uh, sorry." He said, "Hey Nessie, could I talk to you for a minute? It'll be really quick!" She looked at him with wide eyes, blinked twice, and then shook her head as if to see straight.

"Um, okay… sure?" Nessie looked back at me, and at the same time, we both shrugged. "I'll be back in a sec, Jake." She said, and again, I shrugged. They walked in a different direction, until they were out of sight.

I took my seat again, hating how empty it was beside me.

**…**

I looked around nervously. I was on edge. They had been talking for quite a while- I had lost track of time. Normally, the first thing I would be concerned about would be being torn up by Edward- but this wasn't like Nessie. I didn't assume anything, though. I trusted both of them. It's not like they decided to go cliff diving or something stupid like that. They were fine. Hopefully.

"They've been taking quite a while, Jake." Quil said, adding a yawn, "You might wanna go look for them. Just a suggestion." I shook my head.

"What are you talking about? They're fine!" I said, rather quickly. It didn't make any sense- I could see that by Quil's reaction.

"Jacob, calm yourself. You look like you drank Tim Horton's entire supply of coffee or something." He laughed at my startled reaction.

"You can't live a freakin' _minute _without her, can you?" Seth snickered. I snapped my head toward him, letting something related to a growl escape my throat. It only made him laugh more.

"I think Quil might be right for once," Leah joined in, "You might want to look for them. Embry can be stupid sometimes. Or all the time." I blinked.

But then I stood up- quite quickly at that, and looked around.

"Maybe I will…" I said, but just then, it was unnecessary. They came back into view. Nessie was walking funny, almost as if she were trying to balance on something. Embry walked with his hands shoved in his pockets. He wore a smirk on his face, and she wore the same look I had previously- Paranoia.

She began to walk slightly faster (yet more clumsily), when she caught sight of me- but I couldn't tell whether she was relieved or just _more_ paranoid.

She laced her fingers through mine, without stopping her stride, pulling me along with her. She didn't say anything, which was unusual, but she looked like she had just witnessed murder. I would have asked why they were talking for an hour rather than a "minute," but a different question crossed my mind.

"Nessie, what's wrong?" I asked as I started up the Rabbit. She shook her head.

"Nothing." She replied- a little _too_ fast.

"Are you sure?"

"Nothing's wrong." She repeated. She took a deep breath and added, "It's just- Holy Crap! It's already 1:17(am)!?" she said, but I knew that wasn't what was troubling her. But I wouldn't push it.

"Yeah." I said, "Edzilla's about to destroy Tokyo." I chuckled. She plastered a fake smile on her lips. I wasn't stupid, and she knew that. She knew I could see right through it- her eyes gave her façade away. But none of us said anything. In fact, it was quiet for the remainder of the ride.

**Hope you guys liked this chapter! So most of you have already picked up what's happening from the Preface, and I'm not surprised. Well, hang tight- it gets good!**

**Pass this story on to your friends if they're Twilight fans. Also, don't forget to review! The button's right there! **

**vvvvv**


	3. I'm fine!

**Just to answer some assumptions that people will have in this chapter- Nessie is _not _pregnant. This takes place the day after the last chapter; it isn't possible. I just didn't want to lead anybody on. But you never know in the future chapters! (Yet _I _do. Muahahaha.)**

**Edward's POV**

"What's the matter?" I asked. She wouldn't answer, or even think about it.

Renesmee had barely said two words since she came back from the bonfire that night. The next day, she seemed so out of character, but she wouldn't speak of why. I tried to get it out of her, but she refused to think about any events that may have caused her unusual behaviour. The only thing that may have given us the slightest hint was her facial expression, which seemed concerned and worried for the most part, and blank at others. She jumped at the smallest movements did not come too close to anyone.

"Nothing." She said, making the most noise she had that day. She was paler than usual and a little bit colder. She was taking deep breaths- all I could know for sure was that she was not feeling all that well.

Her eyes cast downward and left. She was lying. The circles underneath her eyes were almost as dark as the eyes themselves. She hadn't gotten any sleep that night- something was keeping her up, but she didn't want to think about it. It was quite frustrating.

"Renesmee, I know something is wrong. Don't you think it would be best to talk about it and get it out of your system?" I asked, hoping (but knowing the opposite) that I would get somewhere with her.

She stood up rather quickly and ran to the washroom. All I could think of was, _'Smooth move, Edward._' My suggestion to "Get it our of her system," had made her think more of her physical un-wellness rather than the emotional. She knew what I meant, though, but that probably wasn't the way I should have said it.

I heard the flush of the toilet as she came back into the living room. She sat on the couch, away from me, just as before. Her face was noticeably paler than a fewminutes ago- I might have even seen some green. She sighed, then groaned.

"Renesmee, you're-"

"I'm fine." She insisted. I was glad she was talking at least, but I would have preferred the truth- even if I already knew what it was. She was _not _fine. Carlisle had said that it didn't look anything like the flu or whatnot- but that she might have been nervous about something, or anything along that line. At the moment he said that, she started t block off her thoughts immediately. That's when I knew that something had happened.

"No, you're not." I said, a little bit more firmly, "What happened? You seem a little... out of place lately."

"Nothing happened," she lied, "I just don't feel well."

I sighed. I wouldn't get anywhere with this conversation.

"Maybe Carlisle should-" but I was interrupted as Emmett came booming into the room.

"Eddie!" he calld with huge smile plastered on his face, "There's a storm warning tonight! Guess what that means!"

I rolled my eyes. All I could hear from his head was _'Baseball, baseball, baseball!' _His tounge practically hung out like a dog's, and I wanted to tell him to save it for Jacob, but I wasn't in the mood for jokes at the moment.

"I don't need to guess, Emmett." I said, and he jutted out his lower lip, "You guys go ahead." Rosalie came up behind him and touched his arm, interested until she noticed Renesmee. Her mouth opened as if to say something, but instead rushed to her side.

"Sweetie, you look like you're going to pass out! What's wrong?" She asked, feeling her forhead, "You're cold!"

"I'm fine." Renesmee insisted again, but then I noticed: She really _did _look like she was gong to pass out.

_'Where's Bella?' _asked Rosalie mentally. I shrugged my shoulders.

"She's talking to Jasper, I believe." I said. Renesmee was tensed as Rosalie sat next to her, but not as stiff as she was when I did. I briefly wondered why, but I would never get an answer. I needed to find out. I would ask Jacob if he knew.

_'Jacob,' _I thought. If he did anything to her, I would kill him. Literally. He would not live for more than five seconds. _'But no. He wouldn't do anything to her.' _And he wouldn't, because (to my previous dismay) he loved my daughter. And although she didn't know, I had a feeling she did too. So no, Jacob wouldn't try anything stupid, because although _he _is, he would not act foolish around her. So what had happened?

I needed to ask him.

"Rose, would you mind staying with her for a moment?" I asked, and she nodded. She understood the look I gave her.

_'You think she'll tell _me _what's wrong if she won't even _think _about it?' _she thought. I raised my eyebrows expectantly and nodded. She sighed, and began talking to Renesmee as I proceeded to walk out the front door. I could already hear his footsteps. Perfect timing.

I met him in the middle of the small clearing beside our residence. He looked out of breath, but his grin stuck to his face anyhow. There was something missing from it though- almost as if he was searching for an answer. I answered before he spoke.

"She's back at the house." I said. He nodded, looking as if he was going to continue his run up. I held out my hand in a gesture to stop. He looked at me curiously.

"Uh, Edward?" _'What's up?'_

"She's not feeling that great, Jacob." I said, hoping he would get the hint. He didn't. I should have expected that, though.

"What do you mean?" He demanded. I sighed. _'Is she sick?'_

"Apparently." I said, "I don't think that's all there is to it, though. Carlisle says that she doesn't have to flu, cold or anything along that line. He thinks she's either nervous or stressed about something."

Realization hit his eyes, "Actually, I was hoping you could tell me about that...?" he looked hopeful. I sighed.

"I don't know a thing about it. Renesmee refuses to think about what might be causing it. She is trying to block off her thoughts." I informed him. He looked down, but I could see the concern in his eyes. "What happened last night?"

Jacob sighed. "I don't know." He said. Frustration cooked in my eyes.

"No, Edward. I honestly don't know." He insisted

"Would it have anything to do with why she was home so late last night?" I challenged him. He rolled his eyes.

"I'm telling you, I don't know. She was acting really odd last night-"

"Yes, I've been meaning to ask you about that, too." I said, "Renesmee has been acting quite differently, regardless of her being sick."

He nodded, "Well, she seemed different yesterday. I mean, when we were on our way back. She looked a little bit Paranoid- actually, scared. She was constantly looking around-"

Again, I interrupted, "She was doing that today as well." He disregarded it.

"Anyway, she wouldn't talk. When asked her what was wrong, she insisted that she was fine. And by the way, I had nothing to do with the time we arrived back over here." I raised an eyebrow as he recalled the scene from that night. Embry had asked to speak to Renesmee for a short while, but ended up taking an hour. As she returned, she seemed noticeably different. There were no words spoken on the ride back home

"_Edzilla_?" I asked, recalling the last words he spoke as he returned to the present. He grinned, but it was half-hearted. I shook my head, desregarding the comment. "What did Embry discuss with her?"

"I don't know. Nessie hasn't spoken about it, and Embry says it's not important." He looked frustrated. "Do you mind if I try to talk to her?"

I shrugged. "By all means. But I'm warning you- You probably won't get much out of her."

We walked back rather quickly. He looked around for no reason except that he could. As we walked inside the house, Bella was already there with Renesmee and Rosalie, probably trying to get something out of her as well. Rosalie looked my way, relaying all the information she got.

_'She wouldn't say anything for the most part,' _she thought, _'But I did manage for her to say _one _thing. She says she's just a little shaken. She says it's lingering, and that she'll be fine by tomorrow. Edward... I think she's lying. Her reaction to whatever it was... I don't know why, but I think something somewhat of big significance happened and she's not saying anything. Keep your mind open and as clear as possible to catch what she might be thinking.'_

I nodded, and she sighed.

"She almost passed out on us." Emmett said, once with a worried expression on his face. "I almost got a heart attack." And he began to laugh, but it died down as he realized no one else was laughing.

Jacob sat down beside her, but not close enough that she got uncomfortable. She seemed fine with the distance and I made a mental note to sit where Jacob was once he left. It was like he had a sixth sense with personal space when it involved her. When she needed someone close to her, he was there. When she needed space, he was gone. Right now, she needed both, so he was close by. And I couldn't imagine someone better for her.

"Renesmee," Jacob began, using her full name. He only did that in serious situations, or when he was teasing her, "I'm- We're really worried about you. Could you _please_ tell me what's wrong? It's killing me. It's also killing Edward. And you know hard that is. Haven't you seen the times I tried?"

I narrowed my eyes at him, but stopped when I realized that there was a smile playing at the corners of her lips. Just then, I didn't care what he said about me; as long as he was making progress. Jacob's smile grew. He extended his arm out toward her, putting his hand onto hers. She tensed for a second, but then relaxed, and a thought of trust overcame her. He was making progress. I finally got another clue.

"Jacob, I told you already. I'm okay." It was amazing how she would talk more around Jacob than us. "Why is everyone under the impression otherwise?"

He sighed, giving a gentle squeeze to her hand. "Because you've been acting differently. And you're sick. I don't know if they're related situation or not, but regardless, it's _not _good. I mean, unless you're into that stuff. I've known a few people who try to get sick on purpose because they love the feel- wait, are you one of those people now? How could you not tell me?" He joked again. Her smile extended a little bit, and she tried to hide it by looking down. It didn't work.

"Seriously, Ness, did anything happened today or yesterday? You're decapitating Edward's intrusions. I need to know the secret so I can use it against him." And finally, she let out something close to a laugh, which was heart-warming. He had away with words, unlike me.

"I'm serious, Jake. I'm completely fine. I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night." She lied again, but had something related to a smile on her face.

_"... Aaaannnndddd_? C'mon, Ness. You're a bad liar. I'd say worse than your Mother, but that's impossible." Renesmee turned red.

Bella opened her mouth as if to say something, but I wrapped my arm around her waist, calming her from killing him.

"I'm serious- I'm _fine_. I can explain the whole chain for you if you want." Jacob didn't protest it, so she sighed and continued. "We came home late yesterday, correct? Yes. I didn't get much sleep last night because there was a storm. The thunder wouldn't stop, thus disabling my ability to sleep without being interrupted. This morning, I woke from my not-so-long slumber. In result, when I woke, I stayed tired, and had trouble responding since everything took time to process. I don't know why I'm sick- it's probably nothing. But now I am awake, and more importantly, _fine."_

Jacob snickered. "Sure, sure. I believe you. But you're all of a sudden sick now? You weren't yesterday." And with that, her eyes widened, she stood up, and once again and ran to the washroom. He looked over at me, sighed, and shrugged his shoulders, but a concerned look crossed his face.

Renesmee walked back into the room without the normal grace she normally had. She looked as if she was about to lose balance, but she landed on the couch rather than the floor. She groaned, and all colour had left her face. The dark circles under her eyes were much easier to see now, and her lips were much paler, as Jacob noticed.

"Nessie, are you okay?" he asked, a little panicky.

She groaned again. "I... light-headed... e-everything... is spinning... fast." The sentence didn't come out right, but I don't think anybody cared about that, as they took deep, unnecessary breaths.

Renesmee blacked out.

Jacob was startled, and shook her shoulder, hoping for a response- but none came.

-

**I know this chapter was a little longer than usual- and it was mostly drabble, but it was a filler chapter. I hope you liked it anyway. And please make suggestions! Love you all. next chapter will be better, hopefully.**


	4. Excuses for Bruises

**Sorry it's been a while, LMAO.**

**Jacob's POV**

"Yeah, I think there's a fancy word for that- it's called a _lie_." Emmett said, pronouncing the word so hard it didn't even sound like it anymore. Rosalie punched him in the arm.

We were all in Carlisle's medical study, looming over Nessie to see if she'd wake up. She just lied there, motionless. Or at least she was motionless. Now she was stirring around, almost as if she had a nightmare. Edward kept glancing back at her in between comments.

"My own daughter would not lie to me, Emmett." Edward snapped, "Besides, she knows very well that it's not quite possible." And again, he looked at Nessie. He wished she would wake up. I didn't need to be a mind reader to know that- especially since I was thinking the same thing. Blondie dragged Emmett out of the room by the arm, coming to the conclusion that he's only create more trouble than solutions. It was only Bella, Edward, Carlisle and I left. Oh, and Nessie.

That's when she made a small noise. It normally wouldn't have meant anything, but know, everything meant something. She made a small, whimpered cry. Our heads snapped in her direction. Again, she stirred around, her eyes shut even more tightly then before. I would have sighed, had I not been holding my breath. I couldn't tell what was wrong- only Edward had that luxury, and even he looked confused. She moved slightly again, the whimpering continuing.

That's when Edward's facial expression changed drastically. It went from worried and concerned, to a shocked and almost angry face. There was a swift intake of air (which was unnecessary, which meant it was bad), and in an instant, he was still as a statue; his hands clenched into fists by his side. I heard a small growl from within his chest. Again, more whimpering. I looked closely at her face, her eyes still shut closed, and noticed that her mouth was moving slightly, as if to form a word- the same word every time- but nothing came out except for the whimper. Then her mouth moved in a slightly different way; a different word, none of them familiar seeming as I can't read lips.

"Jacob, loosen her grip!" Edward commanded at me. I was startled out of my concentration on trying to figure out what she was saying. I didn't know what Edward meant, though- loosen _what_ grip? Her hand then twitched, and I saw what he was talking about. She was holding her left wrist in her hand- or rather, clutching. She was clutching it with such tightness, it was losing circulation. With every whimper, the hold would become tighter and tighter, but that's when I snapped back to reality. I gently pried her right hand off of her wrist, but found myself unable to let go of her hand.

Yeah, screw you. It wasn't the whole "I couldn't let go of her hand because I was so madly in love" ordeal (although it would be in a normal situation), I couldn't let go because I finally saw what Edward was seeing- and it was quite a way's away from 'pleasant.' I couldn't actually_ see _anything, seeming as she couldn't, either. It was dark; all that I could tell was that there was somebody else there. They weren't human, they weren't vamp-o. They were one of _us_. One of us, the wolves. The only way I could tell was by the temperature of the rather large hands that aggressively clutched her wrists so tightly, that the physical impersonation that she'd demonstrated on herself a second ago was absolutely nothing in comparison. The man's voice was gruff, he was grunting, because she was fighting back with all her might. The voice sounded somewhat familiar, but I couldn't pinpoint it as the man struggled and strained his voice. With every 'whimper' his grip became tighter. But those whimpers- they weren't as bad when I felt I was in Carlisle's medical study. When I was seeing things through her eyes, they were much louder- in fact, they were screams. But not only screams- screams of a name. She was calling out for help, calling for anyone, but most of the time... me.

That's what the small movements of her mouth were! She was trying to call for help. When no one responded, she began to call my name, but no sound was coming out. Then she started to call out for Edward. Nothing worked, but the hands grew tighter and tighter. She screamed out in pain, and begged the person to stop; to let go. Again, it got tighter. He showed no mercy. Who the fuck was this bastard (Pardon my French)!?

And that's when I heard her scream. No, not her dream scream- her _actual_ scream. All of the people in the room jumped slightly, nobody expecting, although it wasn't even that loud. Regardless of whether or not it was ear-piercing, it was still heart piercing. There were many wide-eyes- one pair being mine. I almost immediately dropped her hand, thinking I may have been holding on too tightly. That wasn't the case, apparently. Edward ground his teeth together so hard I could practically hear it.

Another sharp intake of air; this time from Nessie. Her eyes flew open, and she shot right up into a sitting position. Her eyes didn't settle on anything, just wide and staring at nothing for a few seconds. She took deep, huge breaths and I could hear her heartbeat grow faster. Again, the colour left her face. She then found the courage to look at her surroundings while drenched in the sweat of fear. She calmed down when she saw Edward and me, along with the others. She sighed in relief, and collapsed back down. She closed her eyes, but she was not unconscious.

"Renesmee, are you alright?" Edward demanded. She weakly nodded, but her arms were slightly shaking.

"It... It was just a dream..." she said, but I could tell she was reassuring more herself than Edward. She chanted it quietly to herself a few more times before calming down a little bit. A _little_ bit. Edward took a step toward her and wrapped her in his arms, smoothing out her hair is she shuddered. I was still frozen in place, unaware of what to do. I took a look at Bella, who had a worried expression on her face, but I could see how pissed she was underneath that- she didn't know what was going on, and she hated being left in the dark. Carlisle put a hand on her shoulder to ease her.

I looked at Edward, mentally begging for some sort of answer as to what that could have been. But he had none. He simply looked back at me, looked down, and squeezed her tightly.

"What...?" I began, but could not find the words. Nessie looked back at me with an expression of relief on her face, almost as if I'd survived a plane crash or something. Then she gently squeezed Edward back, and again said, "It was just a dream."

**...**

We still stood in Carlisle's medical study, still holding our breaths (That is a figure of speech to some, reality to others). Renesmee had gotten no rest, and I don't quite think that a nightmare is going to get you the sleep you need. So eventually, she fell back into a light sleep, which was already interrupted a few times. She could barely keep her eyes open, she was _that_ tired. Carlisle used this as an advantage to check any damage she may have caused to herself.

He rolled up her right sleeve, lightly lifting her arm to examine the small bruises that circled her wrist. He sighed and nodded.

"It's nothing major. She just caused a few minor bruises to her wrist. Nothing to worry about." he said, but his eyes lied.

"How did she manage to bruise herself?" Bella asked. I was going to tell her exactly how tightly she was holding on, but she shushed me. "What I mean is, I'm surprised she bruised herself in such a short period of time. Normally it takes abut a day for a bruise to show."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, you would know." I said. She didn't enjoy that one too much, "But seriously, Bells, she was holding on _tight_." She looked at me, but her eyes flickered back to Renesmee. I could see the concern. Who couldn't. I looked back at her too, and watched Carlisle examine her arm. I felt that something was off; that something wasn't right. Edward looked at me, feeling the same feeling. Maybe that's why Carlisle's eyes were lying. Edward shook his head. No, Edward would have said something.

She hadn't had that nightmare again. Throughout the whole "examination" she stayed completely still, and Edward had said nothing in referral to what she was thinking/dreaming. That horrid scene crossed my mind again; her whimpering and clutching her wrist so tightly- just a very minor mirror reflection of what was going on in her mind. Then I thought about her wrist. Could she really have bruised herself so shortly, as Bella said? Something about it was off, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Edward, apparently, could though.

"Carlisle," he said, with a suspicious look on his face, "She wasn't holding onto _that _wrist." He said. He was right! She was clutching her left wrist- not her right! But her right wrist was bruised. Carlisle looked at Edward with a lost expression. Edward shook his head, and I could see a small look of angry confusion cross his face. He walked to the other side of Nessie and slightly lifted her left arm, as Carlisle gently put her other one down. He rolled up her left sleeve, exposing her other wrist.

It was bruised, too.

**Sorry I took forever to update, guys. School stress. LMAO. Hope you liked it- and don't forget to _REVIEW_!**


	5. Over Analyzation

**Sorry for the long wait. =]**

**Jacob's POV**

"I don't know, everyone's just acting…. Different lately." I sighed, getting frustrated, seeming as nobody else noticed what I did. Quil looked around suspiciously, almost as if he was being condemned to death.

It had been a month since we'd discovered Nessie's bruises. She claimed she didn't know where they came from. She was lying, I was sure, as was everybody. Edward, though, he was getting frustrated. Living with him on a normal basis, Nessie had learned to work her way around her thoughts, trying to avoid them if necessary. She was pretty good at it, however, I still needed some work. Edward would shoot everybody bitter looks as the very sound of the word "lie" crossed through their minds. He wasn't able to come to terms with that, but he knew it as well, somewhere.

Blondie was on my ass about it the whole month. She assumed that I knew what was wrong, an assumption that was stupid to make. If I knew, I wouldn't be constantly pestering Edward to see if he'd found out anymore. If I knew, I would have said something right away. Bruises… could that dream be a flashback, rather than just a nightmare? I convinced myself otherwise- she would have said something. But she acted normal now, like nothing had happened, and continued with life.

"M-maybe you're just over-analyzing the situation, Jake." Quil offered, looking over his shoulder. I nearly growled at him, but then realized that the action would get me nowhere. Oh please, like _this _was.

"I'm not over-analyzing anything, Quil." I said rather harshly. "First, almost everybody I know seems like they're hiding something from me, then we find bruises on Nessie arms. Am I over-analyzing something, Quil? _Am I?"_

"Bruises, eh?" he said, his voice getting lower. I leaned in, almost expecting him to tell me more. Naive, I was. "Again, Jake, Over-analyzation. Wasn't Bella real clumsy when he was human? Maybe Ness-"

"Quit bullshitting me. On both of her wrists, there are bruises circling around them. What do you think she did, beat her wrist senseless with a towel rack, _by accident, _and then do it to the other one_ by accident_?" I snarled. Something was going on, and I was being left in the dark.

"What's going on?" Embry asked, walking through my front door. I saw the look he gave Quil, but chose to ignore it.

"No, _you _tell me what's going on!" I demanded. He looked at me for a second, about to say something with a hostile expression on his face, until I spoke again. "Why's everyone acting weird around me?"

"Maybe you're just over-an-" I snarled before he could finish.

It seemed like this situation was an apartment, and everyone had the key- except for me. Geez, how many god damn bones were hiding in the closet?

A lot more than I expected.

----------------

**I'm sorry this chapter is so short after a long wait. The thing is, is that I can't decide what to write next-- so I'm leaving it up to you. **

**Would you like to read the revelation of the events next (The Preface), or do you want a chapter or two more of Jacob trying unwinding of the mystery? Consider- If you choose revelation, everything will go from slow to extremely fast-paced and might look out of place, however, you'll get what you've been waiting for. But if you choose to Unwind the Mystery, your in for a little bit of a wait, yet it makes the story more proportional.. also, if you choose this option, why don't you help me come up with parts for the next chapter leading up to the revelation? This story is in your hands, now, readers! Now review your vote!**


	6. Cover Up

**Renesmee's POV**

I walk back again, shaking ever so slightly. No surprise there, that's how it always is. I don't think my legs can even hold me up, but it would be too much of a giveaway if I passed out now. They're already suspicious, no need to fuel the flame. Especially when I worked so hard to act normal around them all.

Everything's spinning. That should be the least of my concerns. I convince myself that I have to stay conscious and act normal. If I can do that, hopefully, they will ask no questions this time around. Questions make me think- and if I think about this, even the slightest bit, my father would know. And he can't.

And even if he could, he shouldn't. This would kill him inside, I know it would. Either that, or he'd kill… no. I can't think about this! Cut it off, cut it off, cut if off!

Jacob's in view- my biggest obstacle. Hiding this from him is harder than hiding it from my father. I wanted so badly to tell him, to let someone know. But he was the person who could least know. If he knew… I don't know what would happen. All I knew is that I'd been warned.

He "smiles" when he sees me, but its short lived as he sees my shaking. My legs especially. They don't shake because I'm scared, hurt, traumatized or cold. It isn't anything like that. They shake for a different reason. One that, again, they could not know.

I wanted so much to cry for help. I wanted so much to tell someone, and to let them handle it, but I couldn't.

"Hey, Ness." he says, the smile turning into a frown. He knows what he's about to say isn't the reason, but to try to act like nothing's up, he says it anyway, "Are you cold?"

I shake my head, "No, I'm fine, thank you." I'm getting better at this whole "normal" thing, but it's too late now for it to pop into effect. There's no changing their minds. They know something is up. Maybe in a while it will fade? I'm not sure. Hopefully.

He nods, putting the "smile" back on his face. I know its only for my benefit. He's hiding something, too. But I can see right through it. He doesn't want me to know that he's suspicious, but it's a little to late. He's goes back to his "normal" chatty self. His cover up. I laugh along. My cover up. It's like a normal conversation, only both ends of it are fake, and they both know it. But if this conversation were the real deal, it would probably be filled with tears, anger, shock and confusion. So the cover up is better. For now.

Its raining again, go figure. We're in the Rabbit, go figure. Then he starts asking me the questions I dread most. Go figure.

"Ness, I know you say its nothing-"

"Because it is."

"-but I'm getting really worried. You're acting like everything's normal, but I know that's not really the case because every time anybody touches you, you flinch away." to prove his point, his arms reaches over me to touch the shoulder farthest from him, almost as if somebody else is doing it. To both of our dismay, I do flinch. I flinch, and then frown. I open my mouth, but close it again quickly, knowing that is I say anything at this point, it's going to be the truth.

"And Ness… the bruises. You… I know you didn't cause those." he says. I feel a sting in my heart. My hands curl in my lap as I tug my long sleeves down a little further, making sure my wrists are covered. Jake's right. "Listen, it'll be alright. Just tell me. I want to make this better, but that's kinda hard to do when I don't know what's going on."

I look up at him, and he looks at me. We both have concern in our eyes, however mine is for a different reason. Can I trust him? Of course I can! But I know the first thing he'll do is go after him. And if he knows that Jacob knows…

The car's stopped. I look out the window into the night, the night that I hate most. I don't leave, though, because I know he's not done. He's going to say something else, and I don't know If I'll be able to hold the truth in.

"Please." He says, and doesn't say another word. He gets out of the driver's seat and comes around to my side, opening the door for me. I step out, again like nothing's wrong, and we walk to the front of the house. The door is still closed. My father's out hunting, I was told. I'm free to think, to have a moment with myself, to let it out. As soon as I get into those doors.

"Please?" he repeats, pleading this time. It's hard to resist. Too hard.

"Its nothing. Don't let me bother you with my problems." I say with finality. He knows I won't say more, so he stops. I open the door, but before I can go in, he gently grabs for my hand. I flinch, he frowns. He reluctantly lets go, to my dismay, and shoves his hands in his pocket. He sighs.

"Goodnight." He says, and leans over to kiss me on the cheek. It's the first time he's done that.

To think, I would have blushed had something else not been on my mind. I miss out on probably the best second of my life because of… I don't even know anymore. I nod, unable to do anything else. My eyes are still wide as I shut the door. My father's out hunting. I can think.

But I let my thoughts out too quickly. I don't make sure that what I hear is true. Everything floods out so quickly, its hard to catch. I slide down the door, into a heap on the ground. Or at least would have- had my father actually been out hunting.

"Renesmee!?" His gold eyes meet mine from across the hallway.

He's not.

**----**

**Yeah, too bad for Nessie- Edward already went hunting (his eyes are golden, not black). Guess which chapter's next- THE REVELATION! w00t! So stay tuned and keep re reading the preface LMAO.**


	7. The Revelation

_Chapter 7 - The Revelation._

_**Edward's POV**_

"Goodnight," I heard Jacob say. His thoughts indicated that his night was going to be anything but.

I walked down the hallway to meet Renesmee at the door as she walked in, closing it behind her. I stopped abruptly. She exhaled loudly and squeezed her eyes shut, oblivious to my presence. Her thoughts flowed out, almost too fast to understand.

And suddenly, I felt as though I'd been shovelling for so long with a plastic spoon, getting absolutely nowhere, until now. Now, I'd been handed a bulldozer, and was burrowing deep into the dark crevices which were buried deep within Renesmee's mind. And those crevices were _dark_.

'_Goodnight,' _she thought, _'as if that's even possible anymore.'_

Then every reason for her odd behaviour slipped out of her thoughts at blinding speed. Her mind's cover had been stripped away, exposing her every secret that she had held, or most of them.

_* _

_It was black. The only light was that coming from the moon. It seemed like a dark space between buildings, not quite as big as an alley; and much, much darker._

"_Does he know?" Embry growled into Renesmee's ear, as he pressed her up against the wall. She looked up at him in fear, too scared to answer._

"_I said, DOES JACOB KNOW!?" he snarled viciously. Renesmee whimpered. And shook her head, but it wasn't good enough. Not for him. He grabbed hold of her wrists and squeezed them tightly, almost in a gesture to break them. "If you're smart, you'll answer my fucking question. Does he-"_

"_No!"_

"_Good." Embry said, clearly still unsatisfied, "We wouldn't want him knowing- not yet. He would have my head."_

"_I wish." Renesmee muttered, fully aware that he could hear her perfectly._

"_I would be careful with my words if I were you, _sweetheart, _because you've got a lot worse coming your way." He said harshly and pressed his body up against hers. She whimpered as she attempted to loosen his grip, but failed. _

_Embry then pressed his lips aggressively against hers as she continued to fight back._

_*_

"Renesmee!?" I called in a growl. Her eyes shot open and a look of desolate fear crossed her face. She hadn't know I was here and was startled by my "sudden" appearance. "May I speak to you in the other room?" I said through clenched teeth.

"We can't t-talk here?" She asked, her voice rising into a squeak. I made no response, but gestured toward the dining room, where no one else had reason to be. She reluctantly followed me.

"Renesmee…" I started. She swallowed a gulp of nothing.

"Y-yeah?" she stuttered.

"Care to explain?" I said. I prayed it was a joke, that it was nothing more than a tasteless prank, but anyone, educated or not, would know otherwise. Hopefully it was just a misunderstanding- a dream, similar to the ones she had before, only with more clarification.

"Explain what?" She asked, her wide eyes searching for an answer in mine. There was nothing.

"It starts with your thoughts." I said, and she looked at me again, and made no response. "Renesmee, do not try to pretend that those thoughts you just had are nothing. What happened!?"

Her face seemed to be stuck in an expression between the line of fear and misery. She tried to respond, but was never a good liar.

"N-nothing." She lied,_ 'Don't say it, you can't.' _She mentally reminded herself.

"Renesmee, if that dog is trying something on you, I need to know."

"Nothing's happening."

"But-"

"No, Dad. Don't let _me _bother you with my problems!" She exclaimed, red rising to her face. I could not tell whether it was a result of anger, embarrassment or shame. I went with shame.

I was shocked for a moment as she would even consider saying that. There was a certain degree of problems I had the will to stray away from, but this was _not _one of them. If for one second, she believed that I was pass this off as nothing, she was not thinking straight. I didn't necessarily expect her to, not after what I'd seen. _Nobody _would think straight after that. I had just seen Embry try and _violate _my daughter; as far as _I _was concerned, that _was _my problem. And _I _was going to be _his_.

My teeth clenched and my muscles tensed as I thought about it.

"Renesmee, I need to know." I said a little bit more softly, "So I can detach every one of his limbs, slice them into small pieces, wrap them in seaweed, make intellectually challenged sushi, and feed them back to his head; which would still be intact due to the fact that you can't make _something _from _nothing_!"

She flinched away from me and took a step back. She looked down and I sighed. I had gotten considerably loud during the end of my rant, almost a near shout. She had been too used to that lately, and it went right over my head. I had frightened her- _great_. But within reason. And he thought he was going to get away with this? Over my _dead _body. And I'm immortal.

"Listen, I'm not going to stand for this; even if it means I have to-"

"That's all that happened." she interrupted, her face still downward. "He just… that's… t-that's all." But her thoughts said otherwise. Her eyes began to water as another short, unbearable scene came into perspective.

_*_

_Still pressed up against the cold, hard brick wall, Renesmee continued to whimper. Embry seemed too "busy" too acknowledge it. The only distinct source of heat came from his hands, which lingered around her waist. They found their place, tugging and eventually lifting the bottom edges of her shirt up._

_*_

"Renesmee…" I whispered in utter shock. Her head dropped in memory. Her curls covered her face, hiding her expression, but not the tears which effortlessly fell to the floor like a rainy day.

_**(A/N: From here on out, this chapter is a longer version of the preface. Reread for the similarities.)**_

She dropped to her knees in front of me, sobbing into her hands. She made nearly no noise as she cried, but to me, every tear falling was as loud as a jet on take off- you couldn't ignore it, but you wish you could stop it. I wanted to stop her tears, but what could I have possibly said to make it all better? There were so many things I could do, but turning back time was not one of them. Pretending this never happened was impossible.

I couldn't have imagined worse, but apparently, Renesmee could. The crying continued, but I stood crippled by what I was seeing. It was in her perspective, through a pair of mortified eyes- and _I _felt like that, too. What he was doing was… horrific and indescribable. And I felt fear. Fear and weakness, because I could not have stopped what already happened. If I could, I would have stopped many things; this being _first _on my list. I had used the wrong term before- "violation" was to say it much less than mildly. Bt what he had done to her could not be summed up by one, one hundred, or even one million words. It was unbearable- or more importantly, unforgivable. It was…

Murder. The murder of a soul and its innocence. That is _still _much too mild a description.

I, too, lowered myself to my knees. I clenched my teeth and took her in my arms. My cold arms, that could have done so much, but instead did nothing at all. My cold hands gripped her in an attempt to keep her safe and close, but instead longed to squeeze every inch of life out of his soulless body. My cold body grew slowly warmer as the heat of anger rose within.

She continued in tears, but trying to change those into the joy and laughter we preferred miles by far as impossible, as these were a result of the past, being released now. And I couldn't change the past.

But I could make sure of _one _thing.

"Jacob and I will take care of this. Embry will be dealt with. I promise you, Renesmee."

She clutched my sleeves and looked up at me. A look of pure mortification crossed her features; her tear soaked features. She shook her head as if accused of murder.

"No…" She whispered, "No, he _can't _know! _You're _not even supposed to know. You _cannot _tell anyone, Dad! _Please_."

I looked at her with confusion embedded in my eyes. She was too overwhelmed with panic and fear to even consider the reason why. All she was thinking was Jacob.

"I think its inevitable that Jacob will find out, regardless of whether it comes from me or not." I said as softly as possible; a task which is quite hard when you are ready to literally kill the person who did that to them.

"Please… If Jacob finds out, he'll. Embry will…" She couldn't finish her sentence as she began to shake, almost violently, in my arms. I heard Embry's voice, clear as a bell in her head.

"_Remember, Nessie. You'll be quiet, _right_? 'Cause if anyone- especially Jacob, finds out, I will _not _be hesitant to beat you _senseless_."_

"That _Monster_!" I growled. Again, she shook in my arms, and began to cry more. She sobbed into my chest, which was heaving up and down with unnecessary breaths.

I could not believe that this had been going on right under my nose. I didn't understand how Renesmee could have kept this from me- I heard her thoughts all the time, and there was never a thought like this, or even similar. Except for that one dream… which I now knew was not a dream at all, but a flashback.

Bella couldn't have been shielding her, because I still heard thoughts. Empty, meaningless and mundane thoughts, but thoughts none the less. Perhaps she avoided the subject within her mind not to hide it, but because she did not _want _to think about it at all. But for how long was this going on?

Too long.

If some one had told me that this was going to happen, I would have laughed at them and their stupid assumptions. Never, under my careful watch, would anyone get to her, I would say. I wouldn't have believed them in the slightest. Not even if Alice miraculously found the ability to see Renesmee's future. This was impossible. If someone had managed to drill the idea of this so far into my head that I actually _did _believe it, I would never even let her out of the house. I would kill that oversized dog before he could even set eyes on my precious daughter. No, even before that.

"Renesmee?" I asked quietly, smoothing the back of her hair. She nodded, and the sobs stopped momentarily. "When did Embry start… doing this to you?"

So she began to cry again.

A long time, I assumed.

My cold hands then dreamed themselves a wonderful dream; to lace themselves around his neck and tighten until my cold palms were touching through the remaining pieces of his life.

-----

**Voila! I hope you liked it so far! Remember leave a review (and if you don't mind, tell me what you liked about it and what you hope to happen next!)**


	8. Disbelief and No Relief

_**Jacob's POV**_

Sleeping would have been nice. But of course I didn't, because my conscious hated me. It screamed at me to go back, but I didn't. Nessie would be upset if I did- like she wasn't already now. I still hadn't found out what was wrong, and that didn't make things the slightest bit better.

I "woke up" the next morning and stumbled down the stairs. I mean that quite literally. Billy looked over at me, possibly with concern (but even if there _was _concern, I saw humour). He wheeled over to me as I nearly fell asleep on the floor.

"Jacob?" he asked. I unwillingly opened my eyes.

"Didn't get any sleep last night." I said, or attempted to say. It sounded a little more like "Mhmmmhmmhhhmm."

He laughed at me. What else could I expect?

"You know, its four o'clock." Billy said. I looked at him and sat up, wiping the potential drool from my face. "Slept in?"

"Didn't sleep." I repeated, more clearly this time. He looked at me and raised an eyebrow. Again, more humour. If he kept doing that, I might as well have made him popcorn so he could watch his son's epic failure in comfort.

I was up and out of the house within an hour or two. I couldn't wait any longer- I just _had _to know. If Nessie didn't tell me today, she never would. This would be my last shot. I shut the door behind me.

…

The trees were a blur as I passed through them, taking the shortcut to the Cullen's place. It's not like I could have taken any other road, any way. I think people may would have been mildly concerned if they saw a giant wolf running on the sidewalk. That's just my opinion, though.

I soon had the relief of not being threatened by hitting trees as I entered one of the few small clearings somewhat close to the Cullen's place. Maybe about a few kilometres away. I looked around and (just in case) dodged behind one of the many, many trees, phased back, and put on my shorts. I would walk from there. I needed prep time, anyhow. For instance- _how _was I going to phrase this in a way that she just _couldn't _lie? I proceeded to walk, slowly at that, toward the house.

But then in a second, Edward was there.

"Stop." He said, a hostile expression on his face. It looked far away, though, as if his hostility wasn't toward me. I looked around, half expecting him to be talking to someone else. Thank god I changed behind a tree… but no one was there.

"Oh, hey Edward." I said, being cautious with my words and thoughts. "I was just going to-"

"I know." He said flatly.

I carefully peeked around him to see what he could possibly be hiding, but no luck. There was nothing or no one there. I'd never really felt the need to use the term "perplexed" before, until I'd seen Edward's stare now. I slowly stepped around him, about to continue my "stroll" until his arm shot out in front of me. I stopped abruptly, not looking forward to crashing into cement.

"Don't." He warned. I looked at him quizzically, mentally asking him what the hell was going on.

"Leave." He commanded, and although it didn't sound like he meant it fully, I took a deep breath in frustration. "Now!" he snarled when I didn't move.

"I'm not going to leave." I said firmly. "What the _hell _is going on?"

"Its not in your best interest, Jacob. Now don't make me repeat myself. _Leave_."

"I can't, Edward!" I exploded, "I thought you of all people would understand that. This whole situation is haunting me. I need to know. Please."

He sighed.

"Just watch out for who your friends are." he said and turned on his heel, about to walk away from the topic. I grabbed his shoulder aggressively, which didn't phase him in the slightest, but only made him stop. I began to tremble.

"Calm down."

"I can't calm down." I said one final time, "Everyone seems to know the inside scoop except for me. So don't ask me to calm down. This is my _Imprint _we're talking about."

"Its not your business, Jacob." he said, but I saw a different look in his eyes. One that said this was probably more my business than I wanted it to be.

"No offence, but if it isn't my business, how is it yours?" I asked. He looked around in an attempt to hide his lying eyes. He looked down.

"It isn't." he admitted, "Or at least it wasn't supposed to be."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked bitterly.

"It means I wasn't supposed to know." he said, "And neither were you."

"But I don't-"

"But…" he said, and for a second, I thought he was mocking me. He sighed and continued. "But you _did _Imprint on my daughter, and although I wish you didn't have to, you deserve to know, at the very least."

"The very least?" I asked sceptically although I wanted to cheer that I'd finally gotten something out of him.

"The very least, without using fists. Trust me; the last thing you'll be doing is cheering. The last thing, after I rip him to shreds."

"H-him?" I asked, my voice suddenly squeaky. If any "Him" dared to hurt her, I'd kill them.

"Yes, _Him_. Are you sure you want to put a name to the face your imagining pummelling?"

I nodded. Stupid.

He took a deep breath, as did I.

"Embry. He…"

I don't know if his voice drowned out of my mind or if he stopped because he couldn't continue. Either way, I stopped listening. Then I started piecing everything together. Now I had a name.

Embry always asked to talk to Nessie. It would always take and hour. To think, I didn't search them out because I trusted them. Even _Quil _looked for them. The bruises on her arms- almost as if someone- someone strong- was squeezing them tightly. And that dream she had- what if it wasn't a dream, but a flashback? That voice; I knew it sounded familiar. That gruff sounding, grunting asshole- it had to be Embry!

But the final piece of the puzzle was the most obvious. And it wasn't that she would barely talk, or that she'd gotten suddenly sick and passed out. I remembered that she would either flinch or stiffen whenever I got too close. Or any other male, for that matter. She'd be okay around any girls. And she always sat straight up. Straight up and looking over her shoulder with such a tired expression that held paranoia at the same time. Either that or she was curled up into an awkward little ball, hiding her face from the world.

Then a thought struck me. I begged so much that I was wrong and jumping to conclusions. Over-analyzing, as Quil had said. But could I be? Could I really assume something so disgustingly horrid. Could I really even imagine that who I thought was my best friend, would ever do that to my Imprint?

"He… violated Renesmee." He finished. I blanked. A _major _brain-fart. I couldn't think properly suddenly, nor could I breathe correctly.

"Violated?" I asked blankly.

"You know what I mean, Jacob." He said, and did, which is why I wished he wouldn't continue. "That filthy mongrel _raped _my daughter."

I snapped.

"Don't joke around like that, Edward!" I shouted, nearly phasing right then and there.

"Do you think I would _joke _about this, _Dog_!?" That jolted the truth in me. I stood frozen for what seemed like hours- or even days.

"I'm going to kill that bastard!" I snarled viciously, feeling the red hot fury rush to every part of my body in synch with the trembles. That was the first time I'd ever really meant that sentence- and no one would stop me. Nor would anybody _want _to.

I turned on my heel and started in a run. I didn't even breathe- my concentration was elsewhere. Edward's voice was faint as he ran behind me, calling for me to stop. I only slowed.

"Stop!"

"_How can you say that!?" I snarled. "_He _raped _your _daughter, _and you're just standing by! If _you're _not going to do anything, _I _will!"

"Listen, Jacob. I'm not the least bit hesitant to kick his ass into tomorrow, but he threatened Renesmee."

I then stopped.

"_What_!?"

"He told her that 'if she told anyone -especially you- what happened, he would beat her senseless."

**-----**

**Le Viola! I hope you liked it. Its crap for now, I promise I'll do better on the next chapter =[ So remember, review. What do you hope to happen next? Did you like this chapter? Xoxo, Xrizz.**


	9. Memories of an Accessory

**Hey, guys n' gals. I'm back with a new chapter. Just a quick note so READ THIS. This chapter and the next chapter occur at the SAME TIME. This chapter will cover Edward's thought process, and the next will cover Jake's "adventures." The time is important to remember, so you'll understand why some things weren't able to be done. Enjoy! :D**

_**Edward's POV**_

I couldn't stop him- I mean, I could, very easily… I just don't think I _wanted _to. I _wanted _him to run off and rip him to shreds. In fact, I planned to join him, as soon as I felt enthusiastic enough about it. I was mad- I wanted to be excited. Knowing that wouldn't happen soon enough, I slowly unfroze.

But then my nose found a familiar scent. Two, actually. One of them quite close to the one that had just left, I assumed it must be another wolf. My head snapped in the scent's direction, and my fists clenched, ready to attack it.

A shadow like figure came into view, moving quickly. It broke its stride, and ducked behind a tree for only a few seconds before it emerged again. I unclenched my fists as I saw who it was. It was Quil, not Embry.

The relief was short lived, as I wondered why Quil would be here, just as Jacob left. He had a frantic expression on his face and looked around nervously.

'_He's gone,' _he thought. I took one deep breath in. He looked up at me (or actually, down), and I snarled, becoming impatient. Did he know what was going on? He sighed.

"Edward…" He began, and for a moment, trailed off. "Please… cut off my hands."

"Cut off…" I began, but then suddenly snapped on impulse. I don't know why. "_What did you do!?"_

He looked down. _'Too much,' _He thought. And then, again, I was brought into the dreadful world of others' minds. This time, with no warning.

_He walked down the dark, empty street. _

'_If Jake won't look for them, I will. I need to talk to Embry, anyway.' Quil thought. 'He probably won't look for her because he trusts her so much. I guess that's what love is based on, trust, right? I mean, even though they aren't really together yet…'_

_His nose caught on a scent, and then a sound. In fact, almost like someone was being hurt. But why was the scent so familiar? He walked faster, then ran. Quil came to a small open space, not daring to peek in. But then he realized that his job, along with the rest of the pack, was to _protect _humans, not avoid them. But the scent smelled familiar. He was scared to look in fear of who it might be. He sucked it up and walked into the alley-ish space, and froze._

"_Oh, but you know you want it." Said the oh-so-familiar voice with the oh-so-familiar face. Just who he'd been looking for._

"_No." said the oh-so-familiar girl, her head shaking ever so slightly, just as Quil's did._

_Quil turned around promptly, planning on running back and telling Jacob exactly what he saw. Mortified, he took one slow step, then another, and then another, ready to run, until he heard the male voice again. This time, directed at him._

"_Not so fast." He said. Quil slowly turned around again. Embry released his grip on Renesmee, but she did not relax in the slightest. She just looked at him with big, wide eyes. And for a second, he felt as though he could read her every thought. "Where are you off to?" Embry asked._

"_What… what the hell!?" Quil demanded, as though Embry had never spoken. _

"_I could ask you the same question ." he said._

"_What the hell are you doing to her!?"_

"_Nothing of your concern." he said, and as Quil turned around again, "And not of Jake's, either."_

_Quil snarled. Renesmee flinched._

"_Whoa, don't get all up in a knot, buddy. In fact, I suggest you stay and watch," Embry said. Then, again, he grabbed her viciously and pushed her up against the wall. She shut her eyes tightly, and sucked a deep breath in. "Because this is exactly what I'll do to Claire if Jacob finds out."_

_Quil felt like burning ice, in every sense. The anger rose up in a ferocious heat inside of him, but he stood still; frozen. What was he to do? Did Embry really mean that? No, Quil could beat his ass in easily. But he decided that he wouldn't- no, couldn't take that chance. If Embry ever tried something… Quil would never forgive himself._

"_Now get over here and help me hold her down, would you? She's being awfully fussy." Embry tried to force her down to the ground, somewhat successful, however, she attempted to wriggle out of his grasp._

"_No!" Quil rejected instantly._

"_Claire…" Embry threatened in a sing-songy voice. Quil gulped nervously._

_He stood still, attempting to say something, anything, to make this situation stop. But he couldn't. He just stood and stared, wide eyed._

"_Quil, I haven't got all day." Embry said, as Renesmee managed to untangle herself from his grasp. He quickly grabbed her again and slammed her face down into the pavement. She stopped moving momentarily, and then attempted to escape again. She was unsuccessful this time, as he caught her hands behind her back with one hand, and held her head down with the other._

_He opened his mouth to reply, but no words came out. Embry glared at him , and then snarled to Renesmee, "Quit moving!" Her motions became less frantic, but more sly. Once again, she escaped. She stood up quickly, before Embry could drag her back down again. _

_She stumbled into Quil's arms without meaning to, but he held her there for a moment, thinking, 'What if this was Claire? This is my best friend's imprint. If I were to stand by and watch- no, help, just so _my _imprint wouldn't get hurt, would that be in vain, or would that be understandable? I would be able to stand in front of Claire in a heartbeat, but knowing this new, dark Embry, he's pretty good at doing things under people noses. What do I do!?'_

_Embry got up, taking deep, frustrated breaths. Renesmee backed out of Quil's arms, and slowly away from Embry. She turned on her heel as quick as she could to make an escape, but she wasn't fast enough. Embry caught her by the shoulder and violently pulled her back._

"_Quil!" he demanded. _

_He made a decision then, and he knew he would hate himself for it._

_But he loved Claire, and he would do anything imaginable to keep her safe. He knew Jacob would never hear him out if he did find out, and he deserved that. He knew he did._

_Embry slammed her up against the wall again, but this time to face him. With his face only inches from her, he snarled, "Listen, I'm not in a very good mood right now, so unless you _want _your head ripped off, I would advise you to stop moving_, _'cause you would look real funny with your head rolling down a hill."_

"_Stop!" Quil demanded, imagining Claire right then. Embry turned to him._

"_I won't stop, but we can make this go by much quicker if you god damn help!" he said, "I mean, either that or Cla-"_

"_Fine." Quil reluctantly agreed through his teeth. Embry seemed pleased, something related to a smile on his face. Quil saw Renesmee take a deep breath in._

"_Well, what are you waiting for?" Embry said, again impatient._

_Quil took slow steps, in absolutely no hurry, trying to devise away to escape this. There was nothing. When he stood facing her, he couldn't meet her gaze. Her wide-eyed gaze, that held so much fear. He looked down, and as he did, she shut her eyes. Slowly but gently, he grasped her wrists._

"_Renesmee, I'm so sorry."_

"You _WHAT!?_" I snarled viciously, his thought ending. He sighed and held out his hands, as if he _actually _wanted me to cut them off.

"Just rip my hands off and save me the lecture! Let me bleed to death before I heal! I know what I did, and I haven't slept since! Do you think I don't feel guilty? He threatened Claire, what was I supposed to do? You know what it's like with Imprints! I couldn't even look her in the eye, Edward. You want to know why? Because her eyes were _closed_. Closed in _pain_!"

I stood frozen, unable to react to his speech. One part of me screamed to kill him right then and rip his hands off, as he suggested, but the other part of my understood. I didn't know which side to embrace.

**Le voila! That's then end for this chapter! Sorry it took so long, I'm lazy. I bet none of you thought poor, innocent Quil had any wrong in this. XD. **

**RRRREEEEVVVVIIIIEEEEWWWW!**

**By the way, if you're wondering why this chapter is called "Memories of an Accessory", its because Quil was technically and accessory to the crime. XD**


	10. Plan Alpha

_**Jacob's POV**_

"Where is he!?" I snarled.

Leah raised an eyebrow, about to give me a lecture about "manners" before Seth interrupted.

"Where's who?" he asked, his eyes slightly wide.

"Embry." I said as calmly as possible. It was a lot harder than it sounds. "Now where is he?"

"The idiot decided that today he wanted to go cliff diving. _Today_. The water is so cold…"

Leah's voice trailed off, but she hadn't stopped talking. I didn't realize why her voice grew dimmer until I noticed that I was running. The cold wind was whipping at my face, getting me angry, more than I already was. Why hadn't I phased already? Maybe I wanted to save it for Embry.

My conscious screamed at me to go faster, that danger was ahead, and suddenly, I had an idea of what was really going on. And if I was right, somebody was going to die.

I wasn't entirely sure who.

I kept running, skipping the middle ledges of the cliff. He wouldn't be there. If the situation was what I imagined, he would go right to the top, where some "accidents" were bound to happen. No one would be there anyway. Cliff diving was dangerous in cold weather.

I finally got to the top, and for the first time, I was sad to be right.

Embry was standing there, smirking slightly. I could see a flicker of humour in his dark, cold, undeserving eyes. And he saw the opposite in mine. Regardless, he continued in his humour.

"Fancy meeting _you _here." He said, looking me over.

Renesmee stood slightly behind him, looking down and expressionless. She stood completely still, as if she wished she could just disappear. We both did.

Embry looked back, and then at me, as if he was startled.

"Wow, the leeches are getting faster nowadays. When did she get here?" He said sarcastically. Nessie fidgeted behind him. Anything, to keep her mind off of him.

"You sick bastard!" I said, not bothering with 'Hello's.

"Cranky today? I'll go get the -"

"Why don't you shut the fuck up and listen to _me _for a second?" I snarled. I was sickened by the offence that took over his features. "You _sick fucking bastard! _What the hell did she ever do to you!?"

"I assume Eddie told you?"

"Who gives a shit who told me!?" I yelled.

"J-Jacob…" I heard Nessie mutter, who was now staring at me with beyond wide eyes. I gave her the same look back. If I ever thought that eye contact was difficult before, I would never have assumed how much worse knowledge made it.

Embry's head snapped in her direction. "I wouldn't talk if I were you, Beautiful." Nessie immediately shut her mouth, as if she had been slapped across the face. She looked down in shame. _Shame!_

A menacing snarl escaped my throat. That bastard!

"She shouldn't talk? You shouldn't talk!" I exploded, "I'm surprised no one has ripped your tongue out of your filthy mouth, you asshole."

"Whoa, Jake. Calm down. What's the problem?" Embry asked. Either he was talking sarcastically, playing dumb, suffered amnesia, or was mentally retarded. All four, possibly?

"Don't fuck with me, Embry. Don't fuck with anyone."

"Well, it's a little late for that, isn't it?" He smirked. I took a step forward, about to push him off into the cold, unforgiving waters. But I couldn't- Renesmee was right behind him. If I pushed him off, she would fall too. Smart ass bastard.

Nessie's face turned deep red, and her eyes cast downward in shame. More shame.

"How could you!?" I shouted. How could he, someone I considered my best friend? But it wasn't even about that. "If I'm your target, and it seems like it, then you should have gone after me, not her! She never did anything wrong!"

"That is, until the thought slipped to Edward." Embry said, his eyes narrowing. I was caught off guard.

"How did you-"

"I know how the hole bloodsucker power thing works, Jake. Especially hers. " A grin covered his face as he continued, as if Renesmee wasn't there, "Just a few touches in the right places, and I knew everything in a few seconds. So convenient."

"You,"

"Those images are vibrant, man. Maybe later, she can show you a few new vibrant images of her own. I'm sure you'd love them."

Nessie shuttered behind him and took an accidental step back. I ran forward ans shot my arms out, certain that she would fall back into the waters, but Embry beat me to it. He caught her and helped her back onto her feet, but as soon as she regained her balance, she moved slightly away from him.

"Don't touch me." She said in a surprisingly harsh tone. Embry straightened up and his expression tightened. He let her go, but his eyes narrowed.

And then he slapped her.

He backhanded her; striking her across the face. She didn't move, except for her head with the impact of the smack. She didn't make a noise, and her expression didn't change.

But mine did.

"Keep your filthy hands off her!" I demanded, and started to tremble. I didn't want to phase- not here. Not right now. If I phased, someone would probably end up falling off. If it was Embry, I would have laughed, but Ness was behind him, so phasing wasn't an option.

But staying calm wasn't exactly easy, either. Not when the one you love is at the edge of a cliff, h=behind some sick minded idiot you thought was once your best friend.

"My hands are clean, Jacob." He said, raising them up to show me exactly how "clean" they were. But in one quick second, he stepped behind her, holding her wrists in place behind her back.

Nessie was startled and took a deep breath in, trying to free her wrists against his grip. He was holding them too tightly, though, and with every struggle, his grip was tighter and tighter. Embry's smirk disappeared and he looked at me in pure disgust.

"Embry, don't do it." I said through clenched teeth. How could it not be his intention, with the waters roaring beneath him.

"I won't." Embry said. I waited for him to continue, finding that much too hard to believe. "As long as you give me what I want."

"What _do_ you want!?" I shouted, getting straight to it, "I'll give it to you, just don't hurt her!"

"If it were that easy, I wouldn't have had to go through all this." he said, "You know what I want, _Alpha_."

"What?" I asked. I wasn't in the mood for games. He started speaking again, and it was only then that I realized what he was talking about.

"I wish I didn't have to do it like this, although it was kind of fun. But it was the only way you would take me seriously. In fact, I was hoping to do this without you knowing. I figured if you were completely concentrated on something else, you wouldn't be able to fill the position of Alpha. So I had an idea. Maybe if you had to help your little Imprint for a decent amount of time, let's say… nine months? That, and-"

"_You sick, twisted asshole_!" I yelled. He glared at me. Renesmee's eyes went so wide, I thought they'd pop out. Was this the first time she'd heard it, too?

"As I was saying," he rolled his eyes, "You'd be too busy helping her out that you'd be completely preoccupied. But I highly doubt that you were going to make the decision of fatherhood soon enough, so dear Embry thought he'd take the responsibility upon himself- and then dump it on you. And if everything went as planned, she'd keep her mouth- and _mind_, shut.

"So I tried, and tried, and tried again, but nothing happened." he shrugged, "Maybe it just wasn't meant to be. But I didn't have time to try again. And I realized that during my originally planned time, you might have figured it out. So I decided that I would have to make you give up your position of Alpha in a more direct manner. And the only way to do that was to make an immediate demand. So here we are. What better way to get what I want than to endanger her life?

"There's major warnings on the waters today. Rip currents are bringing people out farther. The waters are aggressive, and its dangerously cold. So cold, I would think a person could get hypothermia. The waves would suck you right under if you weren't prepared. What a bad day for cliff diving." He explained, his smile growing wider. I could her Nessie's heart beat go wild.

"What do you want me to do, Embry?" I pleaded, trying to make it sound more like a demand. It didn't quite work.

"All you have to do is give up your position of Alpha to me, and this will all go away." he said flatly.

"Fine! You're Alpha! Just let her go!"

He smiled smugly, "Whatever you say, Jake." He said, and in one swift movement, turned on his heel and pushed her off the edge of the cliff.

Disregarding Embry's presence, I pushed him aside, jumping in after her.

"Renesmee!"

_____

**Oh, no! A cliffhanger (excuse the pun), how could I? XD, I was about to make this chapter longer, but then I decided I would make you all suffer.**

**And also, I had two songs on loop during this chapter.**

**Don't Hold Back - The Sleeping**

**The Hand that Feeds - Nine Inch Nails**

**Please, check out the lyrics. I thought that Embry practically write them himself!**

**I should have asked this question in the previous chapter, but what do you think will happen next?**


	11. Beating the Clock In

**I apologize in advance for any confusion this chapter might cause. I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this. I'm kinda just writing without a plan now. I only planned till last chapter. XDD *smart.* **

_**Renesmee's POV**_

I fell backward, with no time to asses the situation.

I didn't even realize I fell until the freezing water surrounded me; it felt as if I was trapped in ice. It wouldn't be the first time.

Panic overwhelmed me, but I couldn't find the strength to move… or I just didn't want to. Maybe this was my wakeup call- or rather, the opposite. I'd been waiting to just give up for so long; this just seemed like an open invitation. But I soon figured that maybe, just maybe, my dad (or possibly, if I was lucky, somebody else) would probably be upset if I died. Just another disappointment, I guess.

So I began to swim, or try to, at least, until I realized that I wasn't really moving. I didn't think to complain in the least, though, except for the inconvenient lack of air. I just kept feeling a constant pressure pushing me down- and it didn't feel like it was going to let up. _Wonderful_. I'm not quite sure if I meant that literally or sarcastically.

I felt a sharp pain erupt on my left side, knocking whatever breath I had right out of me. And just as I was about to process that, the same feeling hit the back of my head. I opened my eyes for only a few seconds longer to see a blurry figure approaching. I didn't have the strength to move away. In fact, I didn't have the strength to do anything at all at that moment. I began to feel even more light headed.

Then everything went black.

_**Jacob's POV**_

The feeling of the freezing cold water on my skin felt like déjà vu. And not necessarily in a good way.

I held my breath and plunged into the freezing waters, opening my eyes the instant I entered them. I remembered how only so many years ago, I'd done the exact same thing- only that was saving someone from idiocy, not from betrayal. Of course, I don't mean betrayal on Nessie's part, I meant on _his_. He doesn't even deserve a name anymore.

My eyes took a few seconds to adjust to the water, and I could finally identify the shape I was looking for.

Renesmee.

Yeah, it was her. Unmoving. Eyes closed, or as far as I could see. The only movement was her seemingly limp body moving downward. I tried to swim as fast as I could toward her, barely getting there. Then slowly, in slow motion as the water made it, caught hold of her and began to drag her upward, toward the surface.

I took the biggest breath I had in most of my life, enough for the two of us, seeming as she didn't. In fact, she made no response at all as I began to swim to the shore. The only reason I didn't flip out is because she was shivering, which meant she was still alive. Which meant I still had time to save her.

I finally got her out of the water, and carried her to the shore. I looked around briefly, half hoping (and half not) that nobody would be around. Gaining attention wouldn't be the best idea right now. I'd kill Embry myself- I didn't need an army. Or any spectators.

I softly lay her down, watching as she shook. But she still didn't breathe. I swallowed nervously, and took the initiative to _make _her breathe. I took a breath, pressed my mouth onto her cold, pale blue lips, and breathed out again. Nothing happened. I tried again. Then again, then again. Still, no response. My shoulders sank in impotence as my attempts to get her breathing again failed. She was out cold. But giving up wouldn't help her now. If I couldn't help her myself, I needed to bring her to the help that _was _available.

I bent down and gently lifted her head, but as soon as I did, I felt something sticky on my hand. I already knew what it was; I could smell it. And I wasn't too happy about that. Regardless of the fact that I _did _know, I felt the need to retract my hand and check- just to be sure. _Just to be sure_- like I had the time! And judging from my discovery, like _she _had the time.

It wasn't just a little bit of blood. It was a lot. To say I was mildly concerned at this point would be to say the least. So, no, I wasn't mildly concerned. I was… scared. But I didn't have time to be. On the other hand, I didn't have time to man up, either. But I had to.

So I did what I had intended to do a few seconds ago, and I picked her up, ignoring the warm dripping on my arm. _Arms. _Was there more? I shook my head and decide not to think, just to run. As fast as I could, anyhow.

_____

**I'm so sorry I took so long to update, and gave you such a short chapter. But as you read this, I am working on the next chapter pronto! I'll have it up as soon as possible! I've just been busy with high school applications, but I'm done now.**

**On a side note, WOOHOO! 100+ reviews! I love you all! **


	12. Surprise Surprise, Open My Eyes

**For all of those who are wondering when the hell Embry is going to get a point of view, be patient. Lol, anyway, this chapter takes place an hour after "Memories of an Accessory." After all the stuff in the last two chapters happened.**

_**Edward's POV**_

'_God damn it.'_

It was the only thought that ran through my mind as I realized she was no where to be found.

I'd asked Bella as calmly as possible if she knew where Renesmee had gone, but she knew nothing except that she had "gone out, and would be back soon." The moment she asked my why, I felt a pang of guilt surge through me. Nobody knew, and neither did Bella. That made me feel terrible, that Renesmee's own _mother _didn't know what was going on. I had kept it from her to spare her feelings, because I knew it would be too hard to handle. I didn't want her to have to go through the same feeling I did.

_**Bella's POV**_

Edward sat me down on the couch, and after a few moments, did so himself. He sighed, and I could see a pain lurking in his eyes. If he could, he looked like his eyes would be watering. I asked him what was wrong, but the painful eyes were still fixated on the ground, as if he wished he could take back the steps he'd taken. Did something happen with Renesmee?

"Are you alright?" I pressed, placing a hand on his thigh to calm him.

"_I _am, but…" He sighed, "Bella, love, there's something I think you need to know."

I moved even closer to him, and watched his eyes move from the floor to my own. I grasped his shoulder, trying to comfort him. I didn't know what he was going to say, but I already felt bad for whatever was troubling him.

"This won't be easy to say, because it wasn't easy to hear, but…" He paused, and took a deep breath in. He then looked around, as if he wished someone else could say it. I cocked my head to the side, confused beyond belief. Sometimes I wish I had the mind reading ability.

He finally continued, "You remember _Embry, _right?" he said, dragging out the name through clenched teeth. I nodded, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes?" Confused, it came out as a question. "Edward, what aren't you telling me? What does Embry have to do with Renesmee?"

He sighed, "Apparently her."

"What?" I asked, not understanding what he was trying to say. I crossed my arms, trying to think. My concentration, however, was broken

"That monster's been… been…" Then with heavy heart-ache evident in every part of his expression, continued, "violating our daughter."

"What?"

"He-"

"I heard you. And you have a sick sense of humour. Now what's really going on?" I said, narrowing my eyes. I could see his lip twitch as if he were trying to come up with another way to say it.

"Of all the things in the world, I would never joke about this. I'm not lying, Love, although I wish I were. I just thought that you of all people deserved to know."

I stood up then, clenching my fists to my sides.

"He's been… _raping _our daughter!?" I screeched.

Edward flinched.

"_When the hell did this happen_!?" I demanded, "_How!? What the he_-"

"Calm down."

"You did _not _just tell me to calm down." I said, shocked, "How are _you _still calm!?"

"I'm not." he said through clenched teeth. He inhaled deeply, and shut his eyes for a brief moment. They soon shot back open, and his head snapped in a different direction.

Realizing I would get nowhere else in thi conversation, I changed the topic. Sort of.

"Where is she now!?"

Edward froze, "Here." he said, and stood up abruptly, just as the door banged open.

There Jacob stood, panting like a dog, holding Renesmee.

"Edward," he said, "she's not breathing!"

_--------_

_**Oh my Lord!**_

_**I got this chapter done quickly so I could wish all of you a Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays. So that's my excuse for why it's so short. But I hope you liked it, anyhow! Next one will be longer, I promise.**_

_**By the way, thank you shegotdreamz, for reminding me about Bella. This was really just a filler chapter so you would all know that Bella is informed now. I hope I got her reaction right!**_

_**Happy Holidays!**_


	13. Thoughts of a Bystander, or So to Speak

**Sorry guys, but I forgot to mention that this, and the previous chapter, don't take place in the Cullen house. It takes place in the… uh… the tinier Cullen house. You know… the one just for Edwardo and Isabella? Sorry, I haven't read BD in a while and I forgot what**_** it was called. XD.**_

_**Edward's POV**_

I advanced toward them so quickly, I couldn't have imagined ever being stopped mid-stride. But as soon as the scent of fresh blood hit my nose, my body completely froze up. I felt the strange heat well up inside of me, the same one that always took over me when we were hunt- _no. _I took a moment to suppress the uprising beast inside me before I would dare look down from Jacob's undecided expression to what was surely the cause of the too sweet smell in the air. When I finally did, the result was far from what I had envisioned.

There my daughter lay, in Jacob's arms. She looked like a bloody, cold, mangled corpse. And considering Jacob's most recent revelation, she probably was. Renesmee was soaked, and her clothes stuck to her skin, revealing the unsightly, bloody wounds, or more so lacerations, that enveloped her entire left side. Her curls, darkened by the water, hung past Jacob's arms, revealing an even darker patch, which I quickly realized was caused by blood. So much, in fact, that I could barely see each droplet make its way down each individual curl. Never had I truly realized, until then, why they'd named the hue "Blood Red."

I snapped back into the present and continued, more slowly, my few-step trek toward them, and tore Renesmee from his arms. She gasped out in unconscious agony, causing her breathing to kick back into effect (although it was now more of a groaning). Her skin was cold- too cold, and she began to shiver violently. Bella, directly behind me, wore the exact same mask I wore- one of almost expressionless shock.

"Renesmee." I croaked out. I turned my head in Bella's direction, "Bella, Love, could you please call Carlisle and tell him to come assist us here?" She nodded once, grabbed her phone off from the table, and began dialling the number immediately.

"How did this happen!?" I demanded. Jacob's head snapped up, and though out of breath, he tried to explain.

"When… I got there," he panted, "Embry already… She… Nessie… was already th-there."

"Got where!?"

"The c-cliff." he said, raising his arms to emphasize the very top of it. My teeth ground together, and I held Renesmee closer, but she gasped again. I looked down at her eyes, squeezed shut, and frowned.

"How did this happen?" I repeated more softly this time. Jacob again answered, but I had stopped listening. The question was more for me than anyone else.

How did this happen? How could I have let this happen? What could I have done to stop what happened if I had known? Would the result be the same? Would she still be corpse-like in my arms? I doubted it. But I didn't do anything. It happened. I couldn't do anything. Poor excuse. If I had just paid more attention… If I had been the father I was supposed to be…

Bella snapped her phone shut and looked at me nervously. "He'll be here in a minute." she said. I nodded.

Renesmee shuffled in my arms, causing herself discomfort. I laid her down on the couch, her right side facing the back of it as to not irritate the wounds on her left. Speaking of which…

"Jacob, how did this happen?" I asked.

With his breath fully back, he answered. "Didn't you already ask that… twice?"

I shook my head. "No, I mean how did those wounds get there?"

He came around beside me to see what I was talking about. Had he not noticed? His eyes widened as he remembered something. He'd felt that warm, wet feeling of the blood, but hadn't expected to see this much.

"I… don't know."

I sighed and looked down. Just another piece of the puzzle to be solved. And I was sick of this damn puzzle. A thousand pieces, missing too many.

Bella stood with an agitated expression on her face. "Why was I the last to know about this?"

"_None _of us were supposed to know." Jacob murmured. "Besides, we only found out yesterday."

"What do you mean 'none of us were supposed to know?'" Bella asked. "What the hell was this idiot thinking? If no one was supposed to know, how was he going to get away with whatever the hell he was planning?"

I'd completely lost track of the conversation after that. I just knelt beside Renesmee and stroked her blood-stained hair, wondering what to make of anything anymore. I couldn't tell if what had happened to her had really affected me as much as it should. Was it shock, or was it that I wasn't capable of the anger I should be feeling… or the love I should be showing.

There was a knock on the door. Jacob's mind was in chaos, and his eyes couldn't bear to see Renesmee like that any longer (just as I couldn't), so he took a dash to the door for an excuse to escape this, just for a moment.

Carlisle walked in, the small bag in his hand. He looked at Jacob curiously, registering how soaked he was, then saw me and nodded. He took one more step in and smelled the blood; paused, and then swiftly walked toward the couch where Renesmee lay. His reaction was identical to mine- expressionless shock. But his only lasted a second.

"What on earth happened?" he asked while placing his bag on the ground. I stood back up and took a step aside, giving him more room. He removed the sutures from the bag, along with a few other things and began to work while Jacob answered- or attempted to, anyhow.

He grumbled something about a cliff- something _I _hadn't heard. I vaguely remembered him trying to tell me something earlier, but I didn't pay attention. Another thing that I should have done, but didn't.

Jacob remembered a scene of only so many minutes ago. Embry had threatened to push Renesmee off, claiming that if his original plan didn't work, he was just going to have to make the immediate demand. And if Jacob didn't 'give it up,' he'd have no choice except to shove her off. And so he did. And hell, was I ready now more than ever to kick his ass into yesterday.

But what caused the sudden hole in the wall, what caused the stillness of everyone else in the room was not that part of the thought, but what had been said just a moment earlier.

'…_If you had to help your little Imprint for a decent amount of time, let's say… nine months…'_

A sudden surge of anger belted through me. My fist raised to punch someone, but finding empty space beside me, I struck the wall instead, causing a small bit of it to collapse and crumble away under my fist. I stood there, breathing in as much as my lungs felt they could handle, and breathing out more, if you count the metaphorical smoke I was exhaling.

Bella immediately took a step toward me, about to place a hand on my shoulder, but for the first time (for a different reason than it would have been many years ago), I said no.

"Bella, I wouldn't advise that right now." I mumbled. She backed off immediately, as if she understood. But she didn't. She didn't know what I had just seen.

"Edward, calm down." Carlisle urged. He didn't know either, but I took his advice.

I would save the violence for later.

* * *

**Happy New Year!**

**I know it's a tad late to say that. Eheheheh. ^.^'**

**Sorry for the odd ending to this chapter- I couldn't think of anything else. And if I could ask you guys a favour- do you think Edward felt enough regret (or guilt), or do I still have to work on writing emotions? Thanks.**

**Read on, faithful readers!**


	14. Peace of Mind

_**ATTENTION! **_**Before you continue reading this, I need to clear up a mistake I made in a previous author's note. This is SIXTEEN years post BD, not 8. I was getting confused with another story. So remember, she's SIXTEEN!!**

**Continue.**

_**Renesmee's POV**_

The vague sound of voices woke me up. I suddenly wished they hadn't. In only a few moments, a stinging pain ripped through my head and my side. Although it wasn't as bad as before, but I still didn't have a positive thing to say about the way I was feeling.

I tried to open my eyes, speak, or even get up. None of it worked. The voices stopped abruptly. I could hear a faint ringing take it's place. There was another mumble as I finally gathered the strength to open my eyes, only a crack. I instantly regretted it, seeing how unstable the world had become. Everything was spinning and I began to feel extremely light headed. If closing my eyes again would have made it better, I would have done that.

As I tried to take in my surroundings, I noticed four figures surrounding me. But the one I noticed most was the darker of the four. My eyes immediately shot open, and I got up and began to take a few steps back from the figure. My animal instincts took over and I was not able to come up with any rational explanation for who that might be. The only message that was being sent to my brain was '_danger.'_

I heard more talking, and then all of a sudden, a pair of cold hands were gripping my shoulders from behind. I didn't take time to asses the situation- I just got scared. It was déjà vu, and that was the _last _thing I needed at that moment.

The person gripping me tried to say something. With my senses still not all together there, I could only hear parts of it.

"It's… him." I heard, which made me try to fight against the grip. It only held me tighter as it repeated what it had said before with more clarity.

"It's _not_ him!" It repeated. I didn't calm down. Why should I trust them? As far as I was concerned, I couldn't recognize anybody. Not in voice or looks.

The hands held me in their iron grip long enough for my senses to clear up so I could hear, see, and most importantly, _think_ straight. In a minute or two, the room stopped spinning enough for me to realize where I was… and who I was around. In only a moment, I felt the most shame I had in a while.

I had mistaken Jacob for Embry.

I opened my mouth as if to apologize, but he beat me to it.

"Don't worry about it." He said, as if he could read my mind. I could see the hurt in his eyes, and felt like a complete fool. I decided not to speak. Talking is what got me in this position in the first place.

With my mother and grandfather in front of me, I realized who was holding me back. I turned around slowly until I was facing my father. I mentally apologized, but he didn't respond. He just wrapped his arms around me and hugged me.

_**Jacob's POV**_

If you don't already know how it feels to have your reason to live mistaken you for your best-friend-gone-rapist, I'll tell you. Have you ever broken your kneecap? Has anybody ever snapped each one of your fingers backward until they broke? Has anybody ever taken a knife to your gut, stabbed it in, and cut upward until it hit your heart, causing a major loss of blood and eventually, your death?

Why am I asking that anyway? I didn't feel like that. It felt worse. Of course, I didn't blame her. She was scared, which is why it hurt me to be mistaken. I didn't want to scare her- that was the opposite of what I was supposed to do. But of course I can't do anything right! My name's Jacob Black, not Jesus Christ.

Edward swiftly grasped Nessie's shoulders from behind her. I could see it in her eyes: desolate fear. She didn't know what the hell was going on, and she didn't recognize any one of us. At first, I was afraid that she'd lost her memory. After I found out what she really saw, I wish she had. After she had calmed down, she looked down, realizing her mistake. Before she could say anything, I told her not to worry about it. Edward then hugged her, like I wished I could.

Nessie didn't do anything. Actually, she looked uncomfortable. She stood there awkwardly, her face pale and eyes disoriented. Her arms were hovering as if she didn't know what to do with them, so she just dropped them to her sides. Edward hugged her tighter and whispered, "Please tell me you're alright."

She lifted her eyes up to him.

"Don't think like that." he pleaded quietly. Again, she didn't respond, but I could hear a catch in her breathing. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to be Edward or not. I wanted to know what she was thinking so I would know what to say, but at the same time, the world seemed like a more enjoyable place outside her head. But I didn't care about any of that. I only had one thing on my mind, and that was what he'd done. I didn't want to think about it, and I shouldn't have.

I knew that Edward was shooting me a look. I didn't blame him. He already had to see it in Renesmee's head, he didn't have to see it in mine, too. But I tried to stop thinking about it. I couldn't. Not until Embry got what he deserved. But what did he deserve? I sure as hell wouldn't give him what he gave her. As far as I was concerned, he deserved death.

"I wouldn't be surprised if Quil was in on this, too." I said quietly. I don't know why I said it, but I didn't mean it. It seemed pretty easy for people to go under each other's noses now, though. I didn't even think of the possibility that Quil had done anything, but if someone had told me that he'd done something too, I wouldn't be surprised.

Edward's dull eyes flickered toward me. Nessie stiffened. _"I'll talk to you later." _he mouthed. My eyes widened. He had best not tell me what I hoped not to hear.

That was it. I couldn't take it anymore. I had to leave, I had to get away. I wanted some peace of mind, and the only way to do that was beating Embry's ass. I couldn't wait anymore. I'd already waited so many hours. I had to go. No way in hell was somebody gonna do this to _my _Imprint and get away with their head intact.

I took a step out the door when I heard Edward's voice.

"Where are you headed?" He asked coldly. I looked back, my eyes blank.

"I'll be right back."

**-----**

**Sorry for the long wait! I've had auditions to do. **

**So now I have a question for you. Who wants Embry's POV?**


	15. The Guilt Ghost of a Smart Ass

**By the way, in case you guys are wondering why Edward's with Jacob in this chapter, it's because he caught up to him. Would Eddie really miss out on the fun? You guys wanted it, so here it is! Embry's POV!**

_**Embry's POV**_

They were coming. This was going to be fun.

I pushed down the small ghost of guilt that had haunted me from the very first thought I had of this day, and concentrated on the excitement. I'd gone this far already, why stop now? I had nothing to lose.

Except my head.

I smirked to myself as they came into view. I stood right at the border of La Push and Forks, but on my side. Just as Edward came a little too close, I stuck my hand out for distance. He looked down at my feet and growled.

"Whoa, calm down. A treaty's a treaty. And now that _I'm _Alpha, it's back on. No stepping over the border, buddy." I said, drawing an imaginary line on the ground with my foot.

"Say 'buddy' one more time and I won't even hesitate to decapitate your head right now. Not that I'm hesitant in the least." He threatened. I could practically hear the acid rolling through his teeth as he spoke. "Just so we're clear, you're dying today."

"That's unfortunate." I mocked.

"For you." said Jacob, finally joining in. I could tell he was saving his energy.

The small ghost inside me unnerved me. It made me feel almost _bad _to see the anger I had distilled in my former best friend. But what did it matter now? Hell, I'd gotten what I wanted. So why should I care?

"You don't have to, but I do." Edward said, replying to my thoughts.

"You know, if you really want to stay in my head, your welcome to stick around, but I'll just be thinking of all the things I did to your-"

Jacob reached over and socked me in the jaw. I guess I forgot he could step the boundary. Losing my balance for a moment, Jacob took advantage of that and threw me onto the other side, where Edward could get hold of me.

He grabbed on to the collar of my shirt.

"You think you're good at what you do, huh?" Edward said, and punched me where Jacob had. "You think you're a miracle worker? You know what happened to the last miracle worker? He was nailed to a cross. Would you enjoy that, Embry?" he said, his face only inches from mine. He threw me to the ground. "Worthless scum."

That last punch kind of hurt. I rubbed my jaw, already feeling it heal. I got up quickly, hoping he didn't push me down again. He was strong. But maybe I was stronger.

"I highly doubt it." he replied. "Perhaps you would like me to prove that to you?"

"You guys take things too seriously." I said flatly, stirring them up more. If we were going to fight, we were going to _fight_.

"Too seriously!?" Jacob exploded, "She's _sixteen_, you degenerate! You raped a sixteen year old! What the hell were you thinking!?"

I smirked, "I was thinking she was pretty good for a first timer." He literally jumped on me and starting punching the smirk off my face.

He'd knocked me to the ground, and each blow he sent hurt significantly more than the last. I pushed him off and began to get angry. Hell, I wanted a fight, not a beating. Edward and Jacob seemed to be taking turns giving their own fair share of Whoop-Ass. I began to tremble violently, but stopped myself. It should be a fight with fists, not with paws. Edward narrowed his eyes. I could almost see him analyzing how to kick my ass, and maybe even how to kill me. So this was their game- while one had their turn, the other thought. Hm.

I pushed Jake off so hard, he was knocked a few steps back. As he lurched toward me again, Edward grabbed him by the shoulder.

"It's my turn." But this time, I actually put up a fight.

To say it was hard would be to say it in the least. He knew every move I was planning on doing. As long as I was thinking about it, there was no was no way I could get the upper hand. I could only dodge and avoid _his _hits.

"Come on, Eddie," I said, grunting between ducking, "At least she had fun getting those bruises. Man, she was so good, I thought I should've paid."

He ground his teeth together, "Oh, you're _going _to pay!" And with that, he grabbed my collar again, but this time wound his fingers around my neck, closing them together. I'd anticipated it, so I'd taken a breath before, but needless to say, he was holding on _tight_.

"Do you know what you've caused her?" he growled.

'_A good time?' _I thought, edging him on. It obviously wasn't what he wanted to hear. He closed his grip more, and against my will, my bodies natural reaction was to claw at his hands. It was like trying to pull a car with your teeth. Even harder- a truck.

"Wrong answer. That's what I'm having right now." I could see a lingering smile in his mask of anger to emphasize his point.

"Right before I left to catch up with Jacob, I promised my daughter that I would make it hurt. And you know what she said, or thought, rather? She thought there was no point, that you had already gotten what you wanted. She said that I shouldn't waste my time fighting for her, because she's 'not worth it.' She said that in the end, it would do no one good. Renesmee's a very logical person, and when she makes a statement, she's more than often correct. But not this time." His eyes were angry, but a sly smile crossed his face, "Hurting you will do _me_ good, and it will most certainly do her good, even if she refuses to acknowledge it._"_

As I was gasping for air, I could feel two options weighing in on me; almost like an angel and devil on my shoulder. The first option told me to give up, that there was no sense in fighting. But then the devil hopped off my right shoulder and onto my left, stabbing the angel with it's pitchfork and taking over from there. Like a sly whisper, it told me to keep going, and that if I gave up now, I would be a coward. And although the devil hadn't killed the Guilt Ghost yet, I knew it was right. I didn't give up.

Edward continued in his speech of resentment toward me.

"Lost in your own little world, huh?" he said, and I'd noticed that he'd loosened his grip; I could breath.

Not for long.

"You want to stay in that world?" he said, closing his hands together again. "My daughter won't speak to me. She won't speak to anyone! You want to know why? She doesn't think she deserves to. She's afraid! She only thinks, and if you think I have the all-access pass, you're wrong. She refuses to think about you, but you're all that's in her head. It doesn't make sense to me, does it make sense to you? You make her _literally _sick to her stomach. Are you proud?" He waited for my response, and when none came, he continued, "It's unfortunate that _she _was your victim. Now you have to deal with me, and I haven't even begun yet."

'_It's very unfortunate.'_ I agreed mentally. _'Unfortunate because I never got to try all the things I wanted to. I would have had some time, too, had she kept her mouth shut like she was supposed to.' _And before Edward could clobber me again, I added, _'You can hit me all you want, but behind that mask, that pretty little mask of your daughter will always be me.'_

To my intense surprise, Edward released me. A look of something related to shock crossed his face. He stared at me for a moment, his eyes blank. I caught my breath as he just stared, as if I came from another planet. His expression changed, it became something of disgust. Jacob passed him a side-glance, wearing the same expression I did.

But that expression was wiped off my face as he lunged toward me again, grabbing my neck, but in a different way. He tilted it to one side, like Dracula would in-

Oh hell, no.

"Any last words, you superficial impurity?" his voice was like glass: smooth and cold. The Guilt Ghost gave me the guilt trip, saying this was my last chance to get out alive. But I didn't listen.

"Yeah." I said, "I guess your daughter isn't so innocent anymore."

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**Well, there it is. Did Embry die? What about the Guilt Ghost? What will Jacob do next? Hope you enjoyed it, and remember, suggestions are **_**always **_**welcome. Also, a special thanks to Any . Love (take out the spaces) for the witty comments Embry made! Review! **


	16. A Friendly Reminder

**Wow! 180 reviews? You guys are truly the greatest! Well, I hope you sick minded lovelies enjoyed the last chapter. Now, to continue the "epic" tale.**

_**Jacob's POV**_

I almost let Edward kill him. Almost.

"Edward." I said, just before he was ready to bite down. Calm for reasons beyond my understanding, I walked over to him and jerked his shoulder away, forcing him to let go. He stared at me in mystery, until he read what my intentions were.

Embry was ready to die in that moment, or so he was convincing himself. Only I would ever be able to see that little spark of fear in his eyes when I stopped Edward. What was he expecting that could be worse than his death? That was a question that somebody without an Imprint would never be able to answer. That question sparked something in my mind.

"Embry, define innocent." He and Edward looked impatient, but he answered none the less.

"Free of sin? What the hell do I look like, a walking dictionary?" he retorted, but I could tell he was thankful I'd "bought him some time." He wished.

"For once, you're right. So next time you open you're mouth, make sure bullshit isn't spewing from it." I snapped, "That is, if there ever _is _a next time for you."

He rolled his eyes.

Ignoring him, I continued, "I don't forget things easily. And if there's one thing that's burned into my brain almost as important as Renesmee, it's the pack law- the one about the Imprints. I don't give two shits that you're Alpha now; this goes for all packs. Not just this one."

He opened his mouth as if to say something, then shut it. I wished it would have stayed that way, but he decided to smirk, then open it again as he remembered the rule.

"I didn't kill her, though." he shrugged his shoulders, as if he was disappointed there was nothing further I could do.

"No, you didn't." I said, thankful that I was able to say those words, "But you almost did. That law doesn't just go for death- it goes for any harm. Theoretically, if you killed her, we would fight to the death. But since you didn't… well, I guess I should give you that same amount of pain. Though knowing me, I'll get carried away and kill you anyway. But oh well, rules are rules."

I then turned to Edward, who wore an unbreakable mask of anger on his face. I couldn't determine whether it was because of Embry, or because I stole his job of delivering the pain.

"Sorry, Eddie. I've got a 'legal' right." I gave a weak smirk, then turned back to Embry.

Then, almost as if a dam burst somewhere inside the peripherals of both my mind and body, I attacked him.

I could feel the red hot anger flowing through my veins, burning it's way up to my brain, which kept fuelling my anger pictures of what he'd done to Renesmee. Keeping in time with my racing, furious heartbeat, my fist pumped back and forth into his face, or anywhere near his head. I wasn't particular with aim. I could hear a distinct crack- I didn't stop to see whether it was his nose or jaw, but it was definitely one of the two.

"I knew something was up. I didn't want to believe it. I should have followed my instincts, but I didn't. Look what that caused her… Look what _you _caused her!" I spat, feeling borderline crazy. With another angry rush, I violently shoved Embry to the ground. Giving him a two second break to realign his jaw, he snapped it back in place with a grunt. He tried to make a remark, but he couldn't move his jaw enough to make a full sentence. So instead, he shot out only one word.

"Jealous?"

I grit my teeth and stomped my foot down on his shoulder. It wasn't only a crack- it was a crack followed by a pop.

"Mother fucker!" he bellowed.

"My mother's dead, Embry. You decided to go for my imprint instead." My breathing slowed, a slick smile crossing my face. "They say 'if he hollers, let him go,' but that's not the way revenge works. Whatever happens, happens. So cry your damn tears, just like Renesmee did, but I'll warn you now- you won't have any arms to fall into. Not like she did."

That look crossed his eyes again; that one I couldn't place. Was it regret? No. if you were going to regret doing something like that, you would have regretted it after the first time- not the third. And you would have owned up to it. Did he do any of that shit? No.

There was silence.

"_Why_!?" I shouted out. He stood, holding his shoulder. He opened his mouth, then closed it again and looked down. "Why!? If you wanted Alpha so badly, you could have asked. With a little persuasion, I would have given it to you. I never wanted to be Alpha! Why would you work so hard at destroying someone that means _everything _to me just to take away something that means _nothing _to me?" I trembled, like I had been for the majority of this "conversation." But it wasn't anger. I found that out as a tear slipped from my eye. I wiped it away, and no more came. Embry staggered back. His eyes changed again.

"I'm sorry."

I looked back at Edward. His expression hadn't changed. He was still waiting for his turn.

"Sorry?" I asked. I began to laugh. _Sorry_? I keeled over, my ribs hurting from laughter. My eyes watered, trying to process it. It was like the jokes that you hear, and you literally can't breathe. It was _that _funny.

He nodded, and my laughter stopped. He was serious?

Walking over to him slowly, I could see a small hint of fear in his eyes. I grabbed him by the collar firmly. The trembling started again. "I think I misheard you. Want to repeat that?"

"I said I'm-"

"_You're not fucking sorry!" _I threw him against a tree and felt my muscles clench with the impact. I drove my fist repeatedly into his stomach, sending up whiplash, causing his head to hit the tree as well. _"I wouldn't give a shit if you really were! I won't forgive, and __she__ won't forget! I'll nail you to an upside down cross, and __then __you can ask for forgiveness!"_

The trembles shuttered through my body, sending violent ripples. I could feel it. The heat rose up. In just one more shutter, I would phase. And then I would kill him.

"Don't."

Edward pulled me off, preventing my phase. "Let him live with what he's done."

I stared back blankly. What the hell?

He approached Embry and looked him over once. I'd bloodied him up quite a bit without realizing it. Edward scrunched his nose with the scent, and his eyes managed to sharpen even more than they already were. Carefully placing both hands on Embry's shoulders, Edward pulled his knee up into his pride. Embry squealed out and fell to the ground. Edward poured cold words out over his limp, shuttering body.

"Just a little something to be reminded of whenever you have a thought of my daughter."

* * *

**Hope you guys enjoyed it. I know I'm terrible at writing fight scenes. Lmao. I know it took a while to get up, I've been busy. By the way, for anybody who didn't catch it, Edward kneed Embry in the nuts. =]. So, what's your verdict? Did you enjoy it? Do you think Embry's felt the pain he needed to? What do you think will happen next?**

**Thanks for reading. =D**

**(p.s. Sorry this is short. I promise a longer chapter next time. =D)**


	17. Aren't We All Running?

**Well, I worked hard on this chapter, so I hope you'll enjoy it. Take your time reading. This chapter is of course named after the fantastic song by 65daysofstatic. Check them out. =D**

**_

* * *

Renesmee's POV_**

That night I had a dream.

It was not unlike the ones I had been having lately, but it was still unwelcoming.

The skies were various shades of black and gray as far as the eye could see, only illuminated when lightening struck. The noise of rain may have been comforting on any other day, hitting the endless, dead field, but thunderous claps interrupted any peace it might have brought. I could smell the rain around me, along with something else I could not place.

The tree behind me was sturdy. I did not know how I knew that, considering I was not leaning against it. Maybe it was just the appearance. Although the tree's blue and black leaves dwindled to the ground, leaving only the naked branches to bear the cold winds, it stood straight, a never ending strength. I wished I could be like that. I wish I could stand straight and face what was coming with the assurance that I would not break down. But I was about as strong as a dandelion with a hundred pounds set upon it's petals. I would collapse. I was just a dandelion: a burden for those who wished to care for their lawns; trying to blend in with roses. I did not belong, and I was not wanted.

I was surrounded by no one and nothing, except for that tree and the petals around me. I was partially buried in them. Sitting up, I gazed at the ground beneath me. Leaves did not lay there. I had been here for a while, bloodied up and bruised, with no one around me to notice or care. I had been lying there before the leaves fell, back when the skies were blue; back when flowers bloomed, and I was at the very least a lily. Not a dandelion. But I was left here, from circumstances unknown to me, to die and become what I dreaded most. The leaves fell from me, almost in parody of the white sheet that should have been.

I examined my wounds. They were scars still bleeding, wounds that could never heal; never stop hurting. So I stood. Another thunderous boom erupted around me. These elements of what I'd grown used to calling nature became the closest thing that existed to a mother to me. There was no moon. It was not day. This place had no time. No time, because time had better things to do than to bother with me. And I had had nothing better to do than dwell on time. Time, which had been taken away from me. Time… which abandoned me. Time, time, time. The more I thought of it, the funnier it sounded. Time. What did time sound like? Time sounded like laughing, it sounded like crying, it sounded like _living_.

Is that why time left me? Because I refused to live?

It was a valid excuse.

Off in the distance, lightning struck once more. The familiar red bolt was ever present in my memories, taunting me in far off places. It moved. It lived.

I did not.

A figure approached in the distance. It may have been the shadows of those I missed. The visited every so often, exchanging no words, but an invisible, knowing glance. But as the figure drew nearer, I could see not a shadow, but a living being. I feared it. Did it come to take away what I've known for so long? My gray skies, my dead field… they were things I had grown to… tolerate. But to take those away for certainty…

Certainty lasted only shortly. Uncertainty lasted ages. I preferred the certainty of uncertainty. It is what I was used to. But the stranger came nearer still. That face, it was too much for me to handle. I closed my eyes, his presence being the most colour I had encountered in what seemed like centuries. I could hear him sigh. I could smell the fresh grass that sprang up beneath his footsteps. He came to bring peace. But I was already at peace.

He crouched down and gently lifted my hand to his cheek. It was warm to the touch, boldly contrasting the cold of which I was accustomed to. His skin was soft, unlike the ragged grass which rocked me to sleep each night. His breath smelled sweet, rivalling the rain that I woke to each day.

"Open your eyes." The voice rang familiar in my mind. I knew it well. The silky yet gruff voice sang out to me in volumes, though his command was a low whisper. I obeyed. His dark brown eyes stared back into mine. They were the colour of the tree- the one that would never falter. I knew this man well. _He _would never falter, either. He would stand straight and tall for as long as his heart beat, and then some more. He was… the one I'd grown up with. The one I'd grown to love. This field made me forget that.

He stood and pulled me to my feet slowly, wary of the wounds I'd developed. His eyes continued in the soft stare, looking upon me with a small smile lining his lips. His eyes were slightly sad, though.

"You've been gone a while. I've missed you." he gently wrapped his arms around my waist. His grip was strong yet soft.

"I've missed you, too." I replied. I could feel him grinning, yet it was not the grin I had grown to love.

Something then went horribly wrong, and I soon awoke in my own room, screaming with my father by my side.

* * *

**So, I hope you enjoyed it. I'm actually very proud of how this came out. Sorry if it was confusing. For further clarification, Jacob was the one who appeared to her in the dream, and at the very end, he changed into Embry. This is also the night that Edward and Jacob kicked Embry's ass. **

**Thanks for reading, and don't forget to review. And as always, make any suggestions or guess as to what you want to happen next. =D**


	18. What I've Done

**I'm sorry. The last chapter was immensely boring, and this one is too. By the way, I'd like to thank you all so much. It's only now that I realize this chapter is 18 chapters long- my longest story yet. And there's still more to it. I'm not sure how much more, so thanks for sticking with me anyway. You guys really are the best. **

**Jacob's POV**

In the midst of the mess, there was a calm point.

It was short and barely lasted a few minutes, but one would not believe how much someone was capable of thinking of in that short amount of time. I touched upon so many topics that I couldn't believe it myself. What happened, what could have happened, what would happen… All things I was scared to think about. She was raped, she could have died, she would be scared of me from now on…

But that was just the start of it.

Renesmee had changed. I could see it. Anyone could. She was never talkative, so I knew this killed any chances of words escaping her mouth for a while. And if I didn't get to hear her voice, I don't know what I'd turn into. But beggars can't be choosers, and I knew that if she _ever _spoke to me again, it wouldn't be a pleasant conversation. It would bring back bad memories, not good ones. No, of course not.

I could see something in her eyes when she was at the top of that cliff. It was shame… regret… fear. I could see something in Embry's eyes, too. He was having fun. _Fun_. He was enjoying every second of it; using her brought him joy. To get at me. It was my own fault that this happened. But what got me the most was that I really didn't care about Alpha. I didn't know when he found the time to plot all this under my nose, but he was an idiot. He didn't know who Renesmee was. I did.

She cracked under pressure. She blushed at the smallest remarks. Her favourite colour was lavender. She loved the smell of vanilla. Her hair looked best down- it went down to her mid-back. She loved rain. Her eyes were a little sensitive to sunlight. Her pet peeve was incorrect grammar. When the right light hit, her eyes would take on a gold-ish glow. Her average heartbeat was about 90 beats per minute- sometimes I counted during silent moments, just for the hell of it. She wasn't talkative. Grey, pink and lavender, of course, looked amazing on her; but then again, what didn't? She knew how to tie a tie better than I did. She always figured out the ending of the movie before it ended. Her favourite song was "Hey, Soul Sister" by Train. She could sing it beautifully. I loved her. I think she knew all along.

I, on the other hand, was stupid. Stupid, naïve and gullible. I was everything I promised not to be. I didn't believe her one bit when she would say nothing was wrong, but I never pushed farther to find out what was really killing her. I should have, but some sick demon inside me warned me not to. I couldn't decide whether it was right or wrong. I knew that if I had found out straight from her like Edward did, that she would have collapsed in _my _arms rather than his. I didn't know if I could stand to see her like that. What bothered me more was that I could imagine it. I couldn't take the image, let alone if the image was real, in my arms. I wouldn't be able to take it. But it wasn't about what _I_ could take; it was about Renesmee.

A sudden thought came to me. Quil. Edward said something about Quil. Or maybe I did. Either way, he knew more about him than I did. I needed to know how he was involved, because if he did something to her too, I would… I would…

Let's face it. I wouldn't do anything.

I didn't know how to think anymore. Common sense was far past me at that moment. For all I knew, she could have taken her last breaths while I kicked Embry's ass. She was in bad enough condition. She could have died while I took revenge. I knew she hadn't, though, because I could still feel that… connection. No matter how faint it was, it was there, and I was not going to let that go. But theoretically speaking, would it be right if I wasn't there, trying to get back at him? I knew that I could not live knowing _he_ was… and it still bothered me to know that he may or may not have been breathing as I thought of all this. As my rant went on, my thoughts ran in separate directions.

How could Ness act like it was nothing when this all began? She wasn't very good at it, but how could she not… say something? How hard must it have been for her? And I couldn't help her through it, because that would defeat the whole purpose of her silence. She was always strong- physically _and_ mentally, but I still couldn't bring myself to imagine her trying to pull through that with a smile, hoping no one would notice; hoping no one could see how fake and difficult it was. This escaped just being polite. This escaped not wanting others to carry the burden. This was something she was going to have to live with… forever. And ever. And ever._ I _couldn't determine if she would ever be able to forget it during that long, long, long time period of forever, but I know I, as weak minded as I am, would not. How could _she _live with that? She was stronger than me, though. Maybe she would find a way to cope. Could I?

Not even once. Three times. Three fucking times.

I couldn't believe I once was able to call Embry a friend. A best friend. He took away two things- one I couldn't care less for. But in a way, he took Renesmee away as well. But I knew that she wouldn't be able to see it. But he… He may have been stupider than me. Why would someone take such a large risk for such a small thing? A _title _is all it was. A damn title that may have cost her life. It was like stealing free samples. You could have just asked, man. You could have just asked, and I would have given it to you. You didn't have to come up with some elaborate plan and just beg it would go off easily.

I remembered the cliff and what was said. Only then did anything really hit me. The adrenaline of the moment stunted my thoughts, letting anything slip out of my mouth to get answers I wouldn't consider. I didn't stop and think, because there was no time to waste on that. But there was _now_.

Nessie wasn't blind. I think that she knew for a while what my feelings were (and although I never got a chance to hear how she felt, I hoped the feelings were mutual) but never said anything. Maybe. But she never knew I had imprinted. I never thought to bring it up. I didn't know how she would react. But I saw her reaction on that cliff, and it was simply wide eyes. Had she caught it, or was she more wound to what was said not even a word or so afterward? What Embry had been planning… what she had been _used _for…

I could see how she felt. Or rather, _feel_ how she felt, because I was feeling it too. White hot daggers stabbed right through my stomach, distracting my brain from anything but the pain, pain, _pain_. And if I felt like that, I could only imagine how _she _felt. He had come so close… _so close _to succeeding. He'd tried three times, and I was certain one more would have done the trick. If the last one hadn't.

My eyes widened.

My brain had come to terms with something that was just a word to me before. As all this unfolded, I could never really see what happened- only that she was hurt. My brain acted on first instinct. She was hurt. I never stopped and thought to myself "What kind?" Just that she was hurt. I felt the sudden urge to check a dictionary, because the word I thought of in that moment seemed so overused in the matter of a day that it was simply just four letters put together. Just like love, hate, kill, help, hurt… the word "rape" was just another four lettered word to me. Until that moment.

She was raped. R-A-P-E, E-P-A-R, A-R-E-P, P-E-R-A, E-P-R-A, R-A-E-P. No matter how many ways I spelled it, the word remained the same. Changing the spelling wouldn't change the meaning. She was raped.

And it was all my fault.

* * *

**I told you it was boring. I'm sorry, but I needed Jacob to address all the problems they were facing. Thanks for reading anyway, and once again, sorry it was so boring. Next one will be better, I promise. But please, I NEED your input and suggestions. They would help SO much.**


	19. The Last Thing on Your Mind

**Okay, for all those reading, fanfiction didn't send out reminders of my update yet. Tell your friends if they read. This was written March 20th.**

**This chapter is named after the amazing song "The Last Thing on Your Mind" by Lights, which I played on loop throughout this chapter. Check it out. I tried to get two chapters done in the March break. Succeeded! W00t! Wow, I'm lame. And so is the following…**

_**Jacob's POV**_

"P-painkillers?" I asked, a blank tone covering my concern.

"Yes. She… needed them. Quite badly, actually. They knocked her out. Surely, you must have noticed the extent of her injuries. Although she refrained from speaking, the pain was clearly difficult to bear."

Bella stood uncomfortably beside Edward. He was lost. I mean, _I_ was lost, but he looked like he lost his head and couldn't find it; almost like he was in a trance. I didn't bother with him though, still hanging on to Carlisle's words. How bad were her injuries? Could they be that much worse than what I initially saw?

I ran my fingers through my hair, ruffling it in aggravation. I regretted it immediately, realizing I still had a little bit of Embry's blood on my hands. And now it was in my hair. I'd wash it out when everything was sorted out. I sighed loudly.

I didn't know I'd be in for such a long wait.

I shut my eyes tightly and rubbed my temples. Damn, I had a headache, and none of this was helping. It felt like I was hit in the head with a hammer, or even worse- the side that removes nails. Bella asked if I was alright. I lied and nodded my head.

"She's okay, though." I assured myself aloud, but after a long pause, I began to question it. "Right?" I urged, unwilling to settle for any other answer.

"She _will _be." Carlisle replied, barely emphasizing the future tense.

"But…" I probed.

"Jacob-"

"How bad is it, really?" I snapped involuntarily. I didn't mean to, but at the same time, I wasn't in the mood to hear the sugar coated version of the story. He could see that clearly. I questioned myself, if only for a moment, that if I couldn't handle the sugar coated version, what made me think I could handle the truth? I pushed that thought aside. Again, it wasn't about what _I_ could handle.

"Well," I could see the words _'Where to begin?' _lingering in his eyes. That scared me. "She's lost quite a lot of blood. There is a deep laceration in her side, which I stitched up. There is also a small wound on the back of her head." Bella looked down with an expression of slight guilt.

He was leaving things out.

"She has a concussion." Edward said. His eyes, though, would have convinced me otherwise.

"What!?" I snarled.

"Its minor." Carlisle countered (if you can call it that), "It should heal soon, but I would advise that unless it's absolutely necessary, her rest should remain uninterrupted."

"Too late for that." Edward whispered under his breath just as a short but familiar scream was heard.

Edward was there only a few seconds before I was, Nessie already enfolded in his arms. She didn't look up at anyone- her eyes were blank but wide. I could see that through her expressionless shock, there was raw fear. She didn't talk, she didn't move. She stayed completely still, as if moving would end her life. She was pale... too pale. I assumed it was either because she was frightened or because of the loss of blood. My better judgement told me both.

Bella nodded, probably at some gesture Edward made. I didn't pay attention, though.

"Jake, can I talk to you?" she muttered quietly.

_**Edward's POV**_

"Yeah. Don't worry, I-I get it. So, yeah, I guess… maybe I'll be back… later this week?" There was a pause. "Or next week… whatever. It's all the same to me. So… yeah. I'll just… yeah. See you soon." Jacob's voice lingered in the doorframe as he stood awkwardly, saying, or trying to, goodbye. I knew his tone, the way he stuttered his way through his sentence; a day, a week or a year- being away from Renesmee would cause the same amount of pain, no matter the length of time. Especially knowing she was in a vulnerable mental state… It would be difficult for him. Very. But he knew that for now, it was what was best for her.

I turned my attention back to Renesmee. She hadn't moved an inch. For a moment, I questioned if she were even breathing. The door shut softly, but Jacob did not phase and take off. He stood at the door for a good fifteen seconds before he made his leave on foot, walking in human form. It had been quite a few minutes of me muttering, telling her it was just a dream, that she was alright. I could have done it forever, though. Whatever made her feel better. The only problem was that she wasn't feeling anything. She was in utter shock of what she had seen.

She then turned her head slightly to face me, but her eyes made no contact for more than three seconds at a time. She took a sharp breath in.

"It was just a dream. Don't worry, we've dealt with him." She froze, if it was possible any further. "And I'll personally see to it that he never lays so much as his gaze on you. Because then… I'll kill him."

Renesmee sighed. She was relieved that we chose not to end his life, but I wasn't. She was never one to wish pain upon anyone, no matter what harm they'd done her, but I didn't want that degenerate breathing in the same continent as my daughter. In fact, I didn't want him breathing at all.

'_What would that accomplish? You would still be angry. If you hate him that much, let him sink in his own guilt. It might take longer, but it will be more painful.' _she thought. I didn't want to admit that she had a point. I wanted to feel his neck being closed in once again; twice again if I had the chance. It would be the only time I would be okay with the smell of the mutt's blood.

"That may be true, but I'm still not comfortable with him getting away…"

'_Could we… stop talking about this?' _she asked, "Please?"

It was the same "please" that she would beg of that filthy mutt when she just couldn't take anymore. It was the same "please" that screamed "Stop! Can't you see that this is hell for me!?" And what made it worse was that she said it aloud; the only thing she had decided to physically say, and they were words she had begged to the man who violated her time and time again. Was I doing to her mentally what he had caused physically? By trying to make things better, was it working in reverse? She hadn't spoken in fear that she would be hurt- or at least that was what I assumed. But it wasn't that, and I could see it now. She wanted to try and put this behind her, to live as though it never happened by never talking about it. But I was pushing the event back in her face, almost forcing her to remember, to burn it in her brain and never forget.

I shook my head, moving it barely. Renesmee didn't notice. An old feeling returned to me; a feeling from so many years back. Although it's meaning was far different now than it was before, it held the same message. It made me ask myself a question I thought I had put far behind me: Am I a monster?

Clearly.

I nodded, the action being more notable than the last. "Of course." I replied. I stroked her hair once, sighed, and stood.

"Renesmee?" I asked softly. Her eyes averted from their, again, dilated fixation at the wall, and up in a delicate stare into mine. I gave a weak smile which, regretfully, suggested pity, and sighed again. "Try to get some rest. You need it." She forced the corners of her lips into a false imitation of a smile in reply. It lasted not even a half second, and she tore her eyes away from mine, back to the way they were.

I shut the door quietly behind me to see Bella waiting patiently. We walked into the living room, and in a few minutes, Renesmee had fallen asleep once again under the influence to the painkillers. We spoke quietly, making sure not to wake her.

"Edward…"

"I'm fine." I lied. Although I could not see into Bella's mind, I often knew by the look in her eyes what she was thinking. She nodded, not going further.

Her eyes scanned the floor, then the walls, then my face. She looked to the side, then back to me, deep in thought. "Jake left." she finally said, to make conversation. I nodded. "I could practically see his heart on the floor." Stepped on too, no doubt.

"He'll be fine." I said, "He needs to deal with some other… _complications_ as well." Bella's eyes snapped to mine, a look of suspicion crossing her concerned features. A hint of realization took to her eyes.

"Edward, please don't tell me there's more I haven't been told about."

'_Well,' _I wanted to say, '_Bella, love, Quil was in on this too.' _I didn't, though, because it wasn't necessary to go into detail about. I didn't want to cause more grief than I already had.

"No, of course not." I said after a long pause.

"You're lying."

"It's nothing important, Love. Trust me, I wouldn't lie to you." But I did, which made me even more of a monster. She nodded, foolishly trusting me, and changed the subject.

"So, why did Renesmee wake up screaming?"

* * *

**Sorry it ended on a boring note. Next chapter will be a little more exciting, I promise. Jacob's still got some issues to deal with. I have a question for you now, reviewers: The rest of the Cullen's & the wolf pack are unaware of what's been going on. Should they know? **

**Thanks for reading. Review!**


	20. Must've Done Something Wrong

**_*PLEASE READ*_: So according to the few reviews I had last chapter, it appears FF didn't send out notifications of my update. I'm not sure if they sent them for this chapter, but if you haven't read the last chapter, go back, R&R that, then read this. Thankies. **

**This chapter takes place the next day, since I've realized that the past twelve chapters have been about only **_**one**_** day. That's pathetic, and so is the following:**

_**Quil's POV**_

"Quil, could you cover my shift tonight?" Leah asked. I was brought back to attention. It was morning and I wasn't fully awake yet, seeing as I didn't get much sleep. We stood by the bonfire pit, kicking around small pieces of driftwood, waiting for Embry. Or at least they were. I was loathing the mention of his name.

"Sure," I answered blankly, unaware of the question.

The previous day, Leah and Seth had been standing in this same spot while Embry mentioned something about cliff diving. He ran off in the opposite direction of the cliff, they told me as I returned from the Cullen's, but made light of it. I knew something was up. No one in their right mind would go cliff diving on such a bad day. Only a few minutes later, a familiar scent or two was in the area. Again, they made light of it, but I knew who it was. What I _didn't_ know was how she slipped passed Edward.

I realized then what could have possibly happened. Embry had probably- no, _definitely_ planned this "meeting" before. As I went to apologize for what I did, Renesmee must have left as soon as her dad was out of the whole mind reading range thing. It took me only a few minutes to own up to what I did. Edward, upon hearing this, told me as politely as he possibly could to get the hell off his property. I ran back as a wolf, getting back to La Push before his daughter did. She was probably taking her time, and I didn't blame her. So only a few minutes later, Embry went to meet her at the border, and avoiding the watchful eyes of the pack, they walked back through the thick trees which bordered the beach. Or, I can say walked for Embry, probably dragged for Renesmee.

But how come Edward didn't come here looking for his daughter? He wasn't stupid- he was probably the smartest person I knew. So how could he not have noticed she was missing? And if he did, where was he?

I pretended not to notice when they brought the new sent in the area up, knowing Claire would be on the line. Not like I already risked that. _'Hey, Edward, guess what happened?' _Why did I do that? I began to regret it, although I knew that my conscience would eventually get ahold of me and let it out anyway. It could have come at a better time, though. Because of my stupid confession, she managed to slip passed Edward, and from that point on, I had no clue what happened.

Jacob did, though. And I could see that plainly in his expression as he walked quickly toward us the next morning. His eyes held no mercy, and I knew exactly who was coming to "talk" to.

Seth called out to him with a childish grin, bored with our mundane conversation. But seeing as Jacob didn't hear him or didn't care, his smile quickly disappeared.

"Hey, Quil!" Jacob called in the distance, no hint of friendliness in his voice at all. It was filled with so much anger that I could see he was about to boil over. One second he was in the distance, then he was two steps away from me, and the next thing I knew, I could only see out of one eye.

"Jacob, what the hell!?" Leah demanded, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him back, away from me. He shook off her hand violently.

"Back off!" he warned her. Taken aback, she was about to make some threat to him, but I held the hand that wasn't pressed against my face up to stop her.

"Leah, don't." I grumbled through the pain. I deserved that. I was certain that the force he used to sock my eye would have crushed a brick. The only difference was that the brick wouldn't feel it. "Saw that coming." I muttered under my breath.

"You won't be seeing anything soon." his voice was searing, a warning that he wasn't joking. Not like my vision wasn't _already_ impaired.

Leah and Seth could only stare.

"Jake, listen-" I pleaded.

"No, _you_ listen!" He barked, "I've listened to too much of that asshole's bullshit to believe anything you're about to say! You're lucky I haven't done to you what I did to him! How the fuck could you help him, Quil!?"

"I didn't have a choice!" I yelled.

"_Liar! _Everyone has a choice! How could you!? You _know_ what it's like to have an Imprint!"

"Yeah, I do. Do you think I helped him for _fun_? He threatened Claire! I had to do something." I reasoned. He cocked an eyebrow, but the fury still remained in his eyes. "You would have done the same." I muttered.

"The same." He repeated just as quietly as I had said it. "The same, huh? Quil, no. You know what I would have done if that were Claire? I would have told you right away, because I know what it's like to have an Imprint. And after that, I would have made sure that asshole wasn't anywhere near _my_ Imprint. And if he was, I'd see to it that he couldn't feel his legs. Now reverse the situation!"

That hit me at home. I knew I should have done that, but he didn't realize the pressure of the moment.

"Jacob, I acted on instinct. I didn't _want_ to help him! You could never understand; you didn't see the look in her eyes!"

"_I _didn't see the look in her eyes!?" He spat back, "_You_ didn't see her get thrown off a fucking cliff! _You_ didn't jump in after her! _You_ weren't terrified when she wasn't breathing! _You_ didn't feel her blood dripping down your arms! She didn't mistaken _you_ for Embry when she woke up, not seeing straight because she has a fucking _concussion_! _You_ didn't hear her scream because she had a nightmare about you! _You_ didn't see the way she stared at you, _terrified_ of your presence! _You_ weren't suggested to stay away from your imprint for a '_while_'. _You_ didn't see all this unfold in _one goddamn day_! And _you're_ saying _I _didn't see the look in her eyes!?"

…………… Was all I could think. ………… Was all I could say. …………… Was all I could do. ……………… just ……………, as he trembled violently, his eyes watering ever so slightly.

_**Jacob's POV**_

'Renesmee, Renesmee, Renesmee, Renesmee, Renesmee, Renesmee, Renesmee.' Was all I thought as I spoke. My mind and mouth were in separate worlds. My eyes weren't working the way they should have, because all I was seeing was her face. My ears didn't bother with his excuses, but instead the echo of her voice, _"I'm fine." _So I didn't notice when I stunned him silent, not only because I didn't know what I said, but because I didn't care. He was as much of a monster as Embry was.

When her voice faded and my senses cleared up, I noticed it was silent. Seth stood there, his mouth wide open like someone shoved a tennis ball into it. Leah's jaw was clenched. She didn't like being left out of things.

"J-Jake?" Seth dared to call. My eyes snapped in his direction. He bit his lip nervously. I sighed, not wanting to start shit with him too.

"What?" I tried to ask not-so-harshly. I wasn't sure If it worked or not. He continued nonetheless.

"What's going on?" he looked sincerely concerned, and that was when I look at Quil. He held one hand over his right eye and looked down with the other.

"Nothing I really want to talk about right now." I said, keeping it short so I wouldn't burst.

"It's a little late for that." Leah muttered.

"Leah, I swear to God, if-"

"I wouldn't give a shit if you pranced around in a fucking tutu right now, this is a _pack_, and if something's happening within it, we deserve to know." She growled.

What was I supposed to do, say _"Of course, Leah. Well, you see, my dearest Imprint has been raped by our Alpha. Three times. Oh, did I mention he's Alpha now?" _

"Maybe your Alpha should tell you." I murmured.

"What the hell do you mean, Jacob?" Leah demanded, "Have you lost your head? Maybe the leech should check you out, 'cause you're not making any sense."

"I mean exactly what I said. Maybe you should hear it from your new Alpha."

"N-new Alpha?" Seth stammered.

I nodded. "Embry's in charge now." and I began to walk away.

Seth jerked my shoulder back, but when I turned to face him, it wasn't _me_ with the hostile expression. It was him. His eyes held a steady glare in mine, and he took a deep breath in. "Want to repeat that?"

"Okay, so from what I've gathered, Embry did something to the spawn, Quil helped, and you gave that _idiot_ the position of_ Alpha_?"

_"She's not a spawn!"_ I sneered, ignoring all else she said.

"I don't care _what_ she is." Leah responded, "What did Embry do?"

"You don't want to know."

"Um, yes I do, actually. Otherwise, I wouldn't have asked."

"I'd rather not talk about it."

"Well that's too bad. You started, and now you'll finish. If we're gonna have a new Alpha, I'd like to know who he _really_ is."

"You _really _want to know?" Leah stared intently at me, and Seth nodded. Quil made a barely noticeable shake of his head.

"Yeah."

"He raped Renesmee."

.

.

.

.

There was only silence.

.

.

.

.

.

"Come again?"

"I'm not repeating it." I said. It hurt enough to say it once. "Have fun with your new Alpha, because there's no way in hell I'm staying in a pack where _he_'s telling me what to do." I made my decision then without even realizing it. I was going to leave the pack.

_Again._

* * *

**Well, I hope you liked it, thanks for reading. And yeah, I'm totally aware that Stephanie Meyer's Jake probably wouldn't have told them what happened, I'll never live up to her potential anyway. ROFL. **

**Review! =D**


	21. Trading Halo for Noose

_**Renesmee's POV**_

It had been three months since I overheard that he left the pack. Not that it made much difference to me. The last time I saw him, I was a wreck; so much so that who I saw wasn't him, but someone else entirely. I wouldn't be surprised if I had scared him off. In fact, I hoped I did, because I didn't want to cause him any more trouble than I already had.

I never really spoke much, but I spoke even less during that time. So if I did, it was only if I was required to, but otherwise I may as well have said that my voice was never really heard. I was for lack of communication, especially with my father. As far as he was concerned, I wasn't on good terms with him. He knew why. We didn't talk about it, though. We didn't talk about how not a week after I broke down in his arms (which I trusted), did everyone seem to know what I had begged to keep secret. Especially Rosalie. How she threatened to kill him, to do what had already been done; the unnecessary. The way she tried to comfort me, but did the opposite instead… the _pity. _I couldn't stand it anymore. I'd sooner have myself killed than hear anything even _suggestive_ of "I'm so sorry" again.

I needed to get out.

I sat on the edge of my bed, thinking. I wondered if I pulled puppy-dog eyes if I would be allowed to leave my dad's hearing range, just to have some time to myself. Because although me may have pretended to "not listen", I wasn't stupid and knew that he hung on my every thought like it was my last. And I was sick of it. So I sighed and walked over to my closet, digging through the heaps of clothes my shopaholic aunt insisted on buying, seeing as they were meant for one-time-use in her eyes anyway. I finally found a not-so-flashy sweater after what seemed like hours of searching and pulled it over my head. I smoothed out my hair, regardless of the fact that appearances didn't matter, considering the whole point of this is that _nobody_ would see me.

But, of course, nothing ever goes as I plan it, and so the moment he heard the bolt of the door _click, _my father was in front of me, pushing it closed once again. I felt like cursing out, but avoided it, seeing as that was the last thing that would get me out of this situation.

"Where are you going?" he asked, sounding worried. No doubt he thought I was going to hang myself if I had the chance. But he knew where I was headed, and that's why he was the one who sighed and looked down, and not me. "Renesmee, I'm just concerned."

"Sure." I scoffed, "Everybody's '_just concerned'_, right!? You won't give me one damn second to myself because you're '_just concerned_'!"

"You don't underst-"

"I don't understand?" I asked in disbelief, cutting him off. "_I_ don't understand what happened to _me_!? Let _me_ tell _you_ something- I don't care how many years you've lived or how many minds you've read; this is something you will _never_ understand! So you can be as over protective as you feel you need to be. You can smother me- hell, you can _suffocate_ me if you want, but don't talk to me about understanding, because that's something you are _not_."

I had stunned him silent, speaking more in that one little speech than I had these entire few months. So regardless of what he may have heard in my mind, hearing it out loud had, obviously, a greater effect, because the moment the words escaped my lips, he was tense and quiet. I realized then what I had said and apologized, stuffing my hands into my pockets and gazing at the floor. I cursed at myself and bit my lip, something I probably should have done sooner. I was told by a person once that it would probably be better to keep my mouth shut, which I had been doing up until now. Why I followed his advice, I will never know, but I maybe he was right for once. Or so I thought, until I heard the bolt of the door click again and peered up to see the door open, my father holding it for me.

Maybe he realized I was right. Or, much more likely, he realized his daughter was nuts and didn't want to deal with the difficulty of stuffing me into a straight-jacket. Either way, the door was open, and I smiled. Only on the outside, though, because as I learned, smiling was something I could no longer do on the inside. So again, as always, I pulled on that fake little smile just to convince my all-knowing father that I wasn't hiding a noose on me, and that I wasn't looking for the tallest tree I could find.

Being outside felt new to me, seeing as the closest I got lately was the window. So I tripped and stumbled a few times, not without at least a small scratch or two, but made my way regardless. Where I was going, I had no clue, as long as I was far away from my dad's hearing range and from people all together. As long as I could finally avoid questioning or at least the sympathetic looks I got from people who felt too bad to ask, I didn't care if I ended up in Russia.

So I wandered through the woods for a good half hour before finding a place to sit down and settle for an hour or so. The small area seemed familiar, though I could have sworn I had never been there a day in my life. Maybe I had passed by it once or twice with Jacob. Speaking of which…

I missed him.

I sat down by the trunk of some old, massive tree and rubbed my eyes. It was suddenly hard to see. Everything around me was blurry, and it was only when I wiped my eyes that I realized I was crying. I was way out of hearing range by then and thought up a whole batch of things I considered myself to be, such as weak, pathetic and down right useless. My left hand grasped something sharp and rock-hard, but I didn't let go. I held on tighter and tighter with every single thought I had, and what I should and shouldn't have done. So I thought to myself, and knowing the thoughts were truly to _myself_, they became dark and angry.

I should have kept my mouth shut! So many problems could have been avoided and nobody would have had to know. I could have dealt with it myself. I could have, I should have, I didn't. Because all I've done for my whole life was depend on other people to solve my problems for me, so I never learned to fight my own battles. I was weak, stupid and naive. I don't even know why my family cared so much- I was the most worthless member in it. I didn't deserve half of what I had, except my own suicidal thoughts. Even then, I had no right to even think anything like that. I just hated how they cared so much for some… fool that couldn't even put up a quarter of a fight that they could. I didn't want them to bother with someone as low as me. I didn't deserve it, and they deserved better. For all I knew, I've been a hold up these sixteen years. How I wished I had their patience.

But I didn't, so I threw the contents of my hand to the ground with force, lodging the small stone into the ground. My hand bled. I _was_ weak! To get hurt by holding tiny damn rock, not even a human was that retarded. I was going to head home to vampire parents- with a bloody hand. Smart. _Real_ smart. I don't know why my father ever said I had any brains, because if I did, I wouldn't have gotten up at that moment and started violently punching the tree's bark with that same hand out of anger with myself.

"_God damn it_!" I growled, but it was short lived, and the tears slipped down my face again as I examined my scraped and bloody hand.

I heard a snap from behind me and whirled around, terrified. Paranoia took immediate hold of me and I pressed myself back against the trunk, trying to take in everything around me. I heard another snap, and then free walking almost, and I wished I could just disappear. Not now, not when I didn't have a good hand to fight with… not like I would, anyway. I would probably cry and take it like I always did… the stupid, pathetic person I am. So I tried to bury myself in the tree, and my heart beat wildly, hoping that it was anyone, _anyone_ but Embry.

But as I saw who it was, I figured that it wasn't much better.

"Uh… H-hey, Ness." Jacob said.

I suddenly wished I _did_ have noose on me, because it would have brought me great use.

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**I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. Especially her little comebacks and thoughts. Oh, wait, that's all there is in this chapter. xD. Well, my opinion doesn't matter. So tell me what _you_ thought about it. REVIEW!**


	22. The Tip of the Iceberg

**Jacob's POV**

It had been exactly two months and twenty eight days since I had seen Renesmee. I was going to go mad. I had to see her, even though I knew it wasn't the best idea. A lot of things weren't good ideas lately.

Like growing out a beard.

I tried not to look at the razor. The scruff annoyed the shit out of me, but I knew that if my hands even touched that razor, it would be touching my neck soon enough. So I just let it grow in.

I hadn't phased in a while. Not since I broke off from the pack. I still saw some of them on the way, when I went to the bar. Every week. But every week soon turned into every other night, and every other night turned into every night. Pretty soon, I was drinking night and day, trying to get drunk, and failing, thanks to my damn immune system. I couldn't take the feeling of… not feeling. I felt that maybe, just maybe, if I couldn't feel that vacant space, it wouldn't be there. But I knew that it wasn't going to happen, and so did the alcohol. It was almost like the bar was trying to get rid of me.

I think the bartender hated me.

"Just a beer." A guy said to the bartender, and took his place beside me. His voice sounded familiar, but I couldn't place it. And I didn't care. I could have sworn I might have felt a buzz, so right before the bartender walked away, I ordered another one, feeling hope swell up inside me.

"Don't you think you've had enough, buddy?" She said, raising a brow.

"I don't know, am I drunk yet?" I retorted.

She rolled her eyes, sighed, and walked away. She came back shortly, two beers in her hand and plopped them on the counter. One in front of him and one in front of me.

"Last one."

"Fine." I said, and chugged I like it was a Big-Gulp of water in the middle of the desert. It didn't do a thing. "Fuck this." I said, and slammed the empty bottle back onto the counter. The music was playing so loudly that I couldn't hear my own thoughts. "Hey, Soul Sister" came on. I thought the reason I was out was to try and get rid of this feeling, not to bring it back.

"This song is shit." The guy beside me muttered. I didn't look over at him, but responded with "Some people would disagree." He laughed. It was a dark, regretful laugh. It struck me then who it was, so I took a deep breath in an prepared myself .

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked, and turned to face him. He spun on his stool and looked at me for a second before he realized who addressed him. His eyes went wide and he went into defence mode immediately.

"Whoa, Jake. I thought we settled this." He said, and lifted his hands like an innocent man would.

"You'd think so, wouldn't you?"

"Look, I said I'm sorry. I meant it."

"Do you think that justifies raping someone!?" I growled, maybe a little loudly. A group of girls having a good time stopped laughing and moved away, across the bar to resume their conversation.

"Quiet down." he said. I got angry, needless to say.

"Quiet down? Do you think I'm Renesmee? Do you think you can say to me what you said to her?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"If this is gonna turn into anything, take it outside." said the bartender. So I grabbed him by the arm and threw him through the doors. He was completely sober, but I had just a slight buzz. I didn't think it would turn me into that much of an animal.

"You didn't learn anything the first time, did you!?" I said, and again, he shook his head.

"I didn't come here to fight, Jake! I didn't even know you were gonna be here! I said I was sorry. If you can't accept that, I guess this isn't gonna work for either one of us."

"I would accept your apology if you broke my spine, Embry, because you were my best friend. But you didn't hurt me, you hurt my imprint. And I don't give a shit if it was even just a cut, but it was a lot deeper than that."

"You get real corny when you're-"

"I'm not drunk. And I'm glad you think this is funny. Because only you would." The look in his eyes said he was worried. He thought it would be the calm before the storm- he was expecting to have his ass kicked again.

"Jake, I didn't want to do what I did. I-I… I just thought, one day, that it would be nice to have alpha. I never imagined taking it this far. I mean, I had one joking thought, and it turned into a plan… I didn't want to. But when… when I grabbed her arm, I had to."

"Fuck you, man." I spat, and slammed him into the wall. "Fuck you and Quil, and all your damn choices. I couldn't give a shit if you really were sorry, or if you didn't mean to. You did what you did, and that's all that matters. It was the biggest fucking mistake of your life, but apparently you haven't learned anything, because you're still trying to make amends. Just…" I sighed, and loosened my grip, throwing him away like the piece of trash he was, "Just… stay away from her."

I ran my fingers through my hair and walked the other way, to get away from him and the bar. I needed to see Renesmee. I couldn't take this pain. Whatever god was out there had a _cruel _sense of humour! I couldn't see my imprint, yet I was forced to face her offender. My best friend. My god damn best friend! I would stab myself with the nearest broken bottle, whatever it took to get this concept of suicide out of my mind. At least for now. I didn't want to die without seeing her… without making sure she was alright.

So I ran as fast as my legs would take me, the wind and rain whipping against my face. I was tired of all this. I wanted to see her smile, even if it took years for her to ever smile again. I needed to see her eyes. She would be the only reason I wouldn't tear myself apart. I wanted so badly for the pavement to rush up against me and splatter me like a fly swatter to a fly. I knew that if I had known how I was feeling at that moment sixteen years ago, I would have blamed it all on imprinting, being the suck I always was. But I didn't know back then what living meant. I knew now, and I was being ripped so far apart from life that I was literally dying inside. Every moment felt like I had slipped down a hundred foot razorblade and landed into a pool of vinegar.

It hurt.

So I ran, and concentrated on my footing, getting myself tired in hopes of falling and forgetting momentarily about my inner pain and worrying about some stupid scratch instead. A scratch that would heal.

It was a twenty minute run from where I was. If I pushed my legs my hardest, maybe I could make it fifteen. The trees went by faster and faster, and I turned into the trail shortcut I always used. The wind blew fiercely, whipping my hair into my face, thus getting me _really_ annoyed. It was short lived when I came across a familiar scent, though. I wouldn't have cared, had it been anyone's but _hers. _I must have been at least a mile from the Cullen's. Four or five months ago, it never would have struck me odd the see Nessie all the way out here alone, but now it was a different story. The fact that her father let her two steps outside his line of vision confused me. But all the way out here? Something had to be up.

She was sitting by a pretty huge tree, her arms hugging her knees. She snuggled her head onto her knees and held something tightly in her hand; so tightly that it made her knuckles turn white. A small red drop leaked down her palm, and she winced and threw the stone to the ground with force. It wedged itself into the ground, and she stood up, frustration in her eyes.

She faced the tree for a moment, clenched her fists, then began to strike the tree with that same bloody hand. She spared it no mercy, and I was glad I wasn't in that tree's place. The bark chipped and fell away in small chunks, until there was nothing in that small area except for naked wood. She punched once more and growled, "_God damn it_!"

I took a step closer to see what she saw. Her left hand was scraped and bloody; both on the back and the palm. I couldn't read her mind, of course, but I could see it in her eyes, how annoyed she was with herself. Renesmee was left handed, so having it damaged like that would really limit what she could do. A tear slipped down her cheek, but I knew it wasn't for the pain in her hand, but rather the fact that she had caused it herself, taking out her anger on an insignificant object.

I didn't want her to see me. I'm not sure why- maybe I didn't think it would be a good time. But as I peeked around the tree and took a tiny step closer, the most cliché thing imaginable happened.

I stepped on a fucking stick.

She whirled in my direction, her eyes darting around like she was expecting an ambush. I swore to myself quietly and ducked behind the tree. She stopped breathing and stood completely silent. I couldn't do this to her. She was scared, and I knew exactly who she thought I was. So I took the first breath and stepped out.

"Uh… H-hey, Ness." I said awkwardly, trying to break the foot-thick ice. She stepped back, fear in her eyes first, but then she looked down. I licked my lips nervously because I didn't know what to say.

"Is… is this a bad time?" She didn't respond, but instead hid her hands behind her back, like one hiding something would, in hopes that I hadn't already seen the damage done. We stood, silent for a good minute. Something in her shift of posture told me that it was probably the _worst _possible time I should run into her. "I… uh... I can come back later."

She tried to speak, but hesitated and dragged her eyes toward the ground again. I got the point and sighed. At least, if I left, I would know she was physically okay, save her hand. Mentally, I would soon find out. "Well… see you later, then." I said, and turned around. I took one step, and I felt her hand on my shoulder, holding me back. Any other day, I would have jumped and cheered. But I contained myself and turned around to face her.

She backed away immediately, looking down once more. Again, she struggled for words, her mouth opening and closing, until she finally managed to force out, "Wait."

I straightened up a little.

She looked to her left and right, then frustrated and to the ground, again looking like she desperately needed a thesaurus. Maybe even a dictionary. She met my eyes for a fraction of a second and whispered, "Don't go."

It didn't matter then, how many times I might have played this scene over in my head, imagining how this conversation would go. My heart got the better of my head, and the three words I blurted out changed the course of the conversation completely.

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**Hope you liked it. ****I want to apologize for covering stuff that already happened in the last chapter, but I felt we needed to catch up with Jake and his personal life. Sorry. Also, I hope you understood that last paragraph. I'd like to thank spoiled-fairy for the closing of this chapter and all the help she's given me so far.**

**I'd appreciate feedback and suggestions. REVIEW!**


	23. A Conversation

**_Renesmee's POV_**

"W-what?"

"Uh… I- I don't know, uh… why I said that."

I was sure I looked like an idiot, blinking repeatedly and speechless. My heart was in my throat and it felt like I was jumping off of a building. My knees, in that moment, wanted to give out on me, regardless that I knew how he felt beforehand. And so they did, but I caught myself before he could. I didn't need to pass out in his arms after he had just told me he "loved me".

"Are you okay?" He asked, but kept his distance. I ignored his question completely and concentrated on keeping myself up and balanced.

"I know." I said, and started breathing deeply. I didn't know how to handle the moment, and sank to my knees slowly, running my fingers through my hair. I hadn't seen him in three months. This was too much too quickly. I was going to freak out, and my heart was going to explode. Everything around me began to spin, but I refused to let myself fall and be weak. I wrapped an arm as far as I could around the tree so I wouldn't face plant and look even more like an idiot. My mind was in chaos. What was I worried about? Was I even worried? Was I worried, angry, depressed, excited, confused, or surprised? Was it even one of those? Was I insane? Was he insane? Were we both insane? What did sane mean?

"I know!" I said, as if he had been pressing me, asking me if I knew how he felt. I knew, I knew, I knew! But did I? What was wrong with me!? I was collapsing in on myself. It felt like I was falling apart like wet sand; too heavy to hold myself together. How come I didn't have a meltdown for three damn months, when I should have, but now did because of three stupid words that weren't even his!?

I tried to breathe steadily, keep my pulse under control. Jake didn't say anything, much to my satisfaction. One more word would have sent me off the rocket. After a few minutes of clenching my fists and letting tears fall, trying to keep my mouth shut before I said something I didn't mean to like he did, I calmed down a little bit. I tried to stand, but couldn't support myself, so he gently helped me up by the arm. I lightly shrugged him off, knowing it wasn't Jacob who was helping me up, but that stupid little voice inside him. He took a step back like he did something wrong and was expecting to be shunned.

"I know, Jacob." I forced out, and when he continued in silence, I said, "I know you think you love me."

He sighed and smoothed his hair back, figuring he had already said what must have deemed him an idiot and that there was no way to fix it. So he tried to, at the very least, clarify what he had said.

"It was a stupid time to say it, I'm aware of that. But Ness, my head's on straight. I don't think I love you, I do love you."

"If your head's on as straight as you think it is, why do you smell like alcohol?" I said without thinking. "I-I'm sorry. That's-"

"No," he interrupted, scratching his head like he was searching for words, "It's okay. Uh, I guess… It's been, uh, kind of difficult to…"

"To what?"

"Tolivewithoutyou!" He blurted out. He sighed then, and said "I know it sounds cliché, and I know that this is the worst possible time to say anything I've said so far, but it's been difficult and-"

"And so you've been drinking? Jacob, why would you-"

"I know." He said, and smirked toward the ground.

"Do you think this is funny?" I asked in disbelief.

"N-no! Not at all, it's just…" he peeked at me, looked down immediately, and began to snicker lightly. I was very close to smacking him, until he continued. "It's just that you sound the way you always did."

I smiled, but it disappeared quickly, along with his.

"That's only because I care about you," I said. "And because I don't want you to make stupid decisions."

"I can't even get drunk." He reasoned, like it made a difference.

"It's not about that, Jake! It's about everything you've risked; like giving up Alpha. I just don't want you to make mistakes you'll regret later on."

I didn't realize how quiet it was between us; how tense he was after I had said that. He was clenching his fists, and I quickly realized that was the wrong thing to say- at least in his perspective. But I didn't apologize, because I knew he wasn't looking for one, and because I believed in what I said.

"Mistake?" He repeated, "The only mistake about doing that was trusting his word. Don't you realize that nothing would matter if you weren't around? I'd give Alpha a thousand times over than have you dead."

Jake took a step forward, and me back, an instant reaction. He took a breath in and stepped back, giving me double the space.

"Jake, don't you see? You're looking at this through rose coloured glasses! The way you say things… it's like I've made your life better."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know… I guess you just don't see things the way I do."

Again, we stood silent, our eyes making contact every few seconds and breaking immediately. He stared at his shoes, so I couldn't see his eyes well enough to determine if he was confused or sad. No one spoke, no birds chirped, and I could hear nothing in the distance. All that was audible was the sounds of our breathing, our heart beats. A faint ringing filled all the gaps in between. I can safely say it was the quietest minute of my life. So not until the wind blew through the near-leafless trees, rustling them ever so slightly to reassure life in the dead moment, did Jacob speak.

"This is about the imprint, isn't it?" he asked.

I contemplated for a second whether I should have changed the subject. But I couldn't let him live in that delusion. He needed to realize, if he believed it or not, that this Imprint he had on me was brainwashing him.

"Yes." I replied quietly. He nodded his head ever so slightly like he agreed and pursed his lips. I knew he didn't want to have this conversation, but he needed it. It felt like an intervention.

"Renesmee," he started, "I don't know what you've heard, but-"

"I've heard enough to know how you feel, and how many mistakes you're going to make. Don't you see, Jacob? This Imprint is practically brainwashing you! You could have had a life aside from me!"

"I could have, yeah. What a grand life it would be, pointing the barrel to my head." He said. I couldn't find the words to counteract him quickly enough, so he continued, "Pretend for a second that you never knew about the Imprint. Would you still be convinced I was being brainwashed, or would you believe it was real love?"

I couldn't respond. No matter how hard I tried to push the words out, I knew that he would see me through. He knew me well, and I knew him. I knew he knew he was right, and he knew the way he worded the question would make me see that, too.

"I can't answer that question," I admitted, "because I do know about it, and because the answer will affect you more than it will me." I paused. He looked down and shut his eyes for a few moments, like he was trying to think of a response.

"Not to say it isn't 'real love'," I continued, "It's just that it was love that was forced on you. Jake, you know me better than anyone. Probably even better than my father. So you should know that I don't…" I struggled for how to continue, "I don't want you to have to love me."

"I don't have to, I chose to love you." He said.

"No you didn't."

His heart skipped a beat when I said that, which further proved my point. Would he hang off my every word like it would be the last thing he would hear? He knew it was the truth but wouldn't, for the life of him, admit it. In his mind, I made him happy, but now I could see the extent of sorrow I could cause him as well. I got myself into this mess, and he had risked everything to get me out of it. He didn't deserve that, nor did he deserve to think so.

"Maybe I didn't." he finally admitted after so much silence. "But I'm glad it wasn't my decision. If I could have decided without any opinion of you… if I didn't know you… I would have turned around and walked away, because I would prefer to kill myself than to let some girl play with my heart again. But it wasn't my decision. So if you want to call it a mistake, then it was the best damn mistake of my life. I love you, Renesmee; not the imprint."

I stepped toward him and wrapped my arms around him. He didn't move, but his heart skipped another beat. He finally responded and hugged me back.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, "I'm so sorry you believe that."


	24. A Promise

**Jacob's POV.**

"I'm not." I said. How could I be? "I've said it once before- if it wasn't for you, I would probably be dead by my own cause. You've saved my life. Why won't you believe that?"

"Because there's so many fish in the sea. But how can you make a selection when you're trapped in such a small bowl?" She tried to reason. "Don't talk to me about how I saved your life and remember all that you've done for me." I could see that look in Nessie's eyes as she took a step back; the look that said she wasn't worth it, that she owed her life or something. I never thought I'd have to say this, but for once, she was wrong.

I hadn't done anything. I sat and watched everything happen all under my nose. I was an idiot to believe Embry's lies, to assume nothing was wrong. What exactly did I do for her, besides punch him in the face? He was still breathing, obviously not much of an improvement. How could I face her knowing glance and think something else of it?

I spoke what I thought, bringing us back to a topic I wished had vanished. "I haven't done nearly enough. If I'd done what I needed to, he wouldn't have gotten to you. He wouldn't have-"

"_I'm over it_!" She exploded. "Why aren't _you_!?"

And so I was silent.

She had a point. How could _I _still be caught up in what happened to _her_? But at the same time, how could _she_ get over something _I_ still wasn't over? The anger on her face as she said that to me- it was heartbreaking. But the sadness underneath was even more so. What was I supposed to say? What did I want to say? How did I feel? What was the answer? I knew she wasn't exactly in the emotional state to talk about it, and it was stupid of me to start up the topic again. Her eyes watered, but she didn't let any tears fall. She knew that if the truth showed, she would have to give up and admit it- his disturbing presence was still lingering in her mind.

"You're in denial." Slipped out of my mouth. It was probably the worst slip up of the whole conversation.

Her eyes went wide and she opened her mouth to say something. Nothing was said. Her eyes narrowed, and there was a look of something more than anger on her face- it was a look of someone else's betrayal, someone whom she trusted, someone she could never forgive because of three words. But those three words weren't just words like "I love you." What I said had angered her speechless. So she simply turned her back to me, without another word, and began to walk away.

I fucked up. Badly.

So I reached out and grabbed her arm. She shook me off and walked faster.

"Wait!" I called. So she stopped and faced me. Her fists were clenched and she stared at me in _hate_. That hate snapped my heart in two, and each piece divided itself twice, until there was nothing left but dust. But beyond that "hate", there were tears, and she couldn't stop herself now.

"Have you ever thought that maybe I don't _want_ to think about it anymore? Do you know how difficult it is to forget when it's _constantly being pushed in your face!?_ Pity surrounds me! They remind me, and they think they're making things better! Even my god damn father! You're _exactly _like him."

I swear I didn't breathe. She looked down, gritting her teeth, her fists clenching and unclenching. I knew better than to talk. I knew half of what she said was simply just spur of the moment. And I knew that the smallest thing could send her into meltdown mode. The sad thing was, I could do nothing about it. I was forced to stand and watch her slowly rip herself apart for what she thought was the better. This was no longer my territory. As much as I hated it, this was something that I just couldn't help her with. Not only because it wasn't possible, but because she didn't want me to. She didn't want anybody to.

I could imagine what Edward could have possibly said. He was the worst person, put aside Emmett, to go to with problems. He could never understand this (not saying I could) to the extent he needed to. He and Renesmee were alike. Freakishly alike. She could never understand how much love someone is capable of, because that sack of dirt took that away from her, and hid it somewhere too far to find.

If you tell someone that there is a treasure, they won't believe it until they see it. That is, unless, they are the searching type. But if rumour circulates that the treasure has already been found, what's the point in looking? Same went for love.

She cried. She tried to conceal it by being quiet about it, but she couldn't manage to blink the tears away.

"I'm going insane." she thought aloud.

"No, you're not. I'm sorry, I guess you're right. I could never understand… it."

Have I mentioned how much I hated silence? I didn't have mind reading abilities- I would never know what she really thought. I knew I only heard a small fraction of what she really wanted to say, although I could guess accurately most times. But what was she thinking now? She seemed so different from the Renesmee I used to know; so uncertain. She looked at things with such a cold expression that was too difficult to get through. The silence let my mind wander, and that wasn't a good thing. If I got too far, I would get lost. She already was. She stared at the ground, fixated. It was almost like some tiny pebble was the most interesting thing she had ever seen.

I can't describe the way I felt starting the moment we started talking. I was lost for words, and I could say nothing right. Rather than saying "It's okay," and all that stuff that normally makes people feel better, it felt like I had an open umbrella shoved down my throat. I choked up whatever I thought, while the hole I was digging got deeper quickly. With every word she spoke, you'd think I would be happy. But I wasn't. Instead, the word-harpoons struck me right in the heart, and opened like a grappling hook. If I tried to pull them out, it would hurt even more. I needed to hear this, something was telling me, but I didn't quite understand.

"I'm sorry I'm snapping at you." she apologized, "I haven't spoken to anyone for the passed three months. I don't even think I've seen the sky. Forgive me, I just don't know how to think clearly anymore." She sounded so much like Edward it was unbelievable.

"I guess that makes us even." I said, and her eyes softened. She forced on a smile that she couldn't hold for more than a few seconds. "What'll it take?" I asked.

"What?"

"What'll it take for you to _really_ smile again?"

She decided to make a light joke of it. "Shave your beard."

"Done. But what really?"

"Jake, I'm happy if you're happy. And you're not going to be happy if I'm constantly miserable. So take my advice and find someone who won't drag you down with them."

I didn't bother arguing with her point, but instead said, "That won't make you smile."

"No, but it will make _you_." she responded. Again she was wrong.

"No, it won't." I said, "Please. I refuse to be happy until you are. What can I do? I swear I would _walk_ around the world if it would get rid of your pretend smile."

I realized something then. This issue could never be resolved if we would only be happy if the other was. One of us would have to suck it up and smile first, because there was no other way we would both be happy. All we cared about was what was best for the other. But what was best for her was what was best for me, and what was best for me was what was best for her. I guess she saw the confusion on my face.

"Jacob, listen to me. The only thing that could make me happy now is pretending that none of this ever happened. If everybody just dropped it, moved on, and never said another word about the matter, I'd smile again." She said. "Because I know what he did to me, and I don't need people constantly reminding me. It's like they think I've lost my memory or something, and that I need to remember, at every _second_ of the day, that I was raped. So just… don't talk about it, and I'll be happy. I promise."

"It's a deal." I promised in return.

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**Well, I hope you liked it. Next chapter is the last, so make sure you read it.**


	25. Everything in its Right Place

_**Well, this is the last chapter. I hope you enjoy it. Sorry it's in Jacob's POV, but it wouldn't turn out that great in Nessie's. Also, make sure you read to the VERY END. I've got some news for you about… **__**just read it**__**!**_

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_**Jacob's POV **_

It had been a few weeks. I shaved. But more importantly, stuff happened. None of it which really mattered one bit.

I had broken off from the pack, leaving only a small window of time before the rest of them (minus one) followed. I refused to be Alpha again, but didn't deny them the right to follow. So instead, I passed the position onto Seth, who accepted it with wide open arms. Quil had told them the whole story. They had grown to hate Embry almost as much as I had. Almost.

I forgave Quil, as far as he knows at least. But there was still something inside me that made it unbearable to look at him without thinking about what he had done; regardless of whether he was forced to or not. Not that I didn't _want_ to forgive him- I really did- but it would probably never be the same between us.

Again, none of it mattered. I had been thinking that a lot lately. None of it meant a damn thing to me. I heard her laugh the other day and realized, you really _don't_ know what you have until it's taken away. I think she might have realized that too, because she smiled a lot more often. Edward was convinced I must have done something to her to cause a mental overload or something. Then again, Edward had no speaking skills whatsoever when it came to Renesmee. Especially not when everything was happening. I told him it didn't take much; and it really didn't. Just a promise, and that was all. I couldn't tell if he was angry or happy that I'd caused her to be happy again. I think he was just confused. Very.

"So were you." Nessie accused one day as we stepped out of the small theatre. The lights of the marquee shone behind us, reflecting the name of the movie we had just watched backward onto the rippling puddles at our feet.

"I was not." I insisted. I didn't care how many deaths one movie could have in it, or how important the characters were. I absolutely refused to cry.

She rolled her eyes and giggled, "Yes you were. In fact, you still are."

"Allergies." I protested.

"Sure."

The rain turned from a soft patter on the sidewalk to a heavy downpour, raining buckets on the town. We splashed through the puddles, our shoes getting soaked right through to our socks. I grabbed her hand and ran, dragging her along with me. Again she laughed, although most would be depressed in this constantly changing weather.

I opened the door of the car for her and splashed my way around the driver's seat. I was careful when fidgeting with the door handle, hoping not to break it off in the impossible task of opening the damn door. It had always given me trouble. But after much trial and tribulation, it finally gave in. I sat in the cheap fabric coated seat, and realized I had made a huge mistake before leaving the car in the first place- I had left the window open. Now my ass was sure to have a nice, big wet spot on it, despite my pants being soaked in the beginning.

The drive back to the Cullen's was quiet. Not that uncomfortable "I'd rather be somewhere else" kind of quiet, but the type where you don't need to talk; when you know what the other person's thinking. We had been having a lot of those moments lately. Sometimes I would hear her heart rate speed up the slightest bit, and it would spark the most vicious of curiosity's flames in me.

"What're you thinking about?" I asked during the silence.

"You'll laugh." she said quietly, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. It was silent for the most part, besides the endless slapping sound of the rain to the windshield.

"What if I promised not to?" She considered it for a moment, then her eyes met mine.

"I was trying to figure out," she said, "how my dad's mind reading thing works. I wonder if as soon as you're close enough, he can hear you, or if it gradually fades in or something like that."

I'll be honest- I've always wondered that myself.

"Why would that be funny?" I asked. She shrugged and shook her head, her cheeks turning the slightest pink as small, embarrassed smile crossed her lips.

"Because I never felt the courage to ask him."

I grinned at that accidentally, which caused her to sigh and say, "I knew you'd laugh."

Again, I laughed, not helping my cause at all. "I'm not laughing at _you_." I explained, "I'm laughing at him. I don't think he realizes how intimidating he is."

"What do you mean?"

"There's a lot stuff I've wanted to ask him, but I never got around to it because he scared the crap out of me. I just find it hilarious how even though he's not a big guy, he's so intimidating that not even his daughter will ask questions."

She smiled but didn't say anything, and returned to staring out the window.

It was silent for the rest of the ride.

We pulled up into the driveway. I got out and opened the door for her, trying my best to shield her from the rain. I realized it was inevitable. As we were nearing the front door, Nessie grabbed my hand to stop me from going any further.

I stared at her expectantly, waiting for her to say something, anything. Instead, she just stared at the ground. But I waited, regardless of the fact that we were both getting soaked to the point of no return. I really didn't care for that though, because I knew there was a reason she had stopped me.

"I… I uh…" She struggled getting the words out, turning pink in the process. I waited patiently while she fiddled with her fingers, trying to think. She finally sighed and said, "Thanks."

"Any time." I said it like it was the answer to an obvious question.

"N-no, I mean," she began, stuttering, "I mean thanks for everything."

"Any time." I repeated, feeling a tug at the corners of my lips. The rain fell heavier, but I still waited, because she hadn't moved, lingering there like she was trying to remember what she was going to say, but forgot. She bit her lip and looked down. Needless to say, that was a look I had seen before and I didn't like one bit. Something was on her mind still, and she was keeping it in.

"I just… You've… You were there for me when I pushed you away, and you've done so much more than I-" But I cut her off mid sentence.

I don't know why I did it. I really don't know why I kissed her then, startling her stiff as a board. I don't know how long it lasted, or really, what I was even doing. But I clutched her arms, leaned in and kissed her, stopping her rant (and her heart beat), hoping something would happen.

And so something did. She draped her arms over my shoulders, pushing her lips onto mine. It might just be me, but I might have felt her smile.

Something else happened, too. That something was a lot less pleasant though, and I would not have noticed it unless that something cleared it's throat, causing us to fly apart like we'd been electrocuted.

"Welcome back." Edward's voice was filled with acid, a tone no one other than he could muster. Renesmee was absolutely red; I mean _red_. She ran inside that fastest I had ever seen, passing Edward without so much as a quick glance. From inside, I hear Emmett laugh, and knew that he had caught on.

"I'll give you ten seconds." Edward sneered, his eyes filled with a four alarm fire like I had never seen in my life. "Go!"

Surprised he had even given me a chance to keep my head, I ran. And when I say I ran, I mean I _ran_. I could hear the countdown begin, and I was already phased in the trees, running like it was a life or death situation because it was.

"Don't get used to second chances, Mutt!" He called after me and started off.

As I ran for my life, I thought two things:

One_: 'I kissed her. I actually fricken' kissed her!'_

And two: _'Damn, I love her.'_

Edward thrived off my thoughts, his legs moving faster than mine. He was catching up to me, and I realized quickly that the only reason he'd given me a head start was so that I'd apologize. He tackled me down and I knew that if I was gonna dedicate myself to Renesmee for the rest of my life, I was gonna have to put up with Edward, and that was fine by me. She was worth it.

She was worth all of it.

* * *

**The end.**

**Sorry, it was a little rushed.**

**I just wanted to thank everybody who reads this story for sticking around for TWENTY FIVE chapters. Longest story I have up. Thank you all so much! Wow, I can't believe it's over. :'(**

**But with endings come beginnings, and with that, I present to you my next Jake/Nessie adventure: The Burning. I promise you it will be ten times better than this, since I've been planning it since September. After I get enough reviews on it, I'll post the first real chapter (since I have the preface up) and with that, I will post the full summary.**

**I'm sure you'll love it, especially if you're a mystery/paranormal/psychological/drama kind of reader. In other words, ghosts and shit.**

**Oops, did I spoil that?**

**But please, guys. Read it. I've worked too hard on it not to get your reviews. They mean the world.**

**Again,_ thank you _for following this story for so long, and I'm sorry this author's note is so long, but just go and read The Burning. =D.**


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